


poison ivy

by retrofuture



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, Multi, Polyamory, Slice of Life, Triple H Inspired, changkihyuk, changkyun is hyuna, i love me some poly soft relationship, kihyun is edawn, mentions of past suicide attempt, minhyuk is hui, slow burn? kinda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-19 11:32:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 28,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17000832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/retrofuture/pseuds/retrofuture
Summary: Maybe love can't be the same for everyone. Maybe love comes in two very different boys and not in one. Maybe the universe aligned differently for them, and they don't mind it one bit.





	1. minhyuk.

**Author's Note:**

> minhyuk for all his strenght has softness on his edges like little sunflowers growing out of his heart.

minhyuk doesn’t know how he got caught up in this situation. one day he was roaming the streets, doing some stealing here and there, messing with the wrong gangs and ending up in some back alley with too many bruises to count, and now here he was. watching as kihyun lazily flips the pages in a book that’s probably too heavy on the melodramatic side and changkyun dances through their living room, cigarette hanging from his lips, only wearing a silk robe.

“what you got there, babe?” he asks kihyun who doesn’t even lift his eyes from the page he’s currently pretending to read. his feet dangle in the air over the armchair side in a rhythm only he can seemingly hear. he has to dye his hair again, minhyuk distantly thinks. the dark roots are starting to show and it doesn’t necessarily look ugly, but he knows changkyun will get annoyed with it and dye it for him soon enough.

“nothing. i’m bored. we should steal some shit, break into a house maybe.” he responds and danger flickers through his eyes momentarily. it’s barely there — everything about kihyun is barely there — but minhyuk can still see it.

“break into a house, you say?” changkyun’s ears seem to perk up at that. “can we wear masks? like those cool ones we saw on “the purge” last week?” he looks like debauchery in person. his eyes closed, a lazy smile spreading across his lips while he blows smoke to the ceiling. the red of his robe looks so deep — a bloodish type of red —, and it should be a whole religion itself the way it contrasts with changkyun’s skin.

“sure, darling.” minhyuk replies, affection dripping from the pet name. his hand gestures for changkyun to come and sit down on his lap, share the cigarette with him. “whatever you want.”

changkyun makes a show to sit on minhyuk’s lap: cigarette recklessly being waved in the air, while he tries to walk slow and show all the skin he can in his _outfit_ — as he would call it. he never takes his eyes off of kihyun, who hasn’t yet lifted his eyes from the book until changkyun started moving towards minhyuk. changkyun is blushing faintly and kihyun smiles at him before resuming his reading. minhyuk grabs him by the waist and steals the cigarette from his hand before the ashes fall and ruin the _oh-so-expensive_ carpet changkyun just had to have.

“ _whatever i want?_ ” changkyun’s eyes glint mischievously, adjusting himself on minhyuk’s lap. he slips the robe off his arms and turns around to throw it at kihyun’s face.

“he’s spoiled.” kihyun grabs the robe and throws it back on the empty seat of the couch, not an ounce of irritation behind his voice when he says it. “ _you’re_ spoiling him.”

minhyuk doesn’t pay him any attention as he kisses slowly over the tattoo on changkyun’s shoulder and feels the other melt around him. he stops as to to take a drag from the cigarette he still has on his other hand but changes his mind. “open up, darling.” is all he has to say and changkyun is complying. he places the cigarette between changkyun’s lips — the kind of lips you can’t help but stare and wonder what they feel like, taste like — and watches as the younger takes a drag from it. he pulls the cigarette away and watches the smoke turn almost yellow in the air where it spreads from changkyun’s lips, the faint light outside their window painting it as the sun sets.

kihyun comes behind changkyun, hands splayed on his shoulders, and minhyuk knows he wants attention too, _needs_ it. “what do you think, baby? do you want to wear a mask and a wig?” minhyuk asks in a teasing tone but his next words get lost as soon as he locks eyes with kihyun. he’s wearing the green contacts again, the ones that make him look so soft, but positively menacing when he wants to too.

“ _please_. it’ll be fun, you old man.” changkyun turns to look at kihyun and wiggles in minhyuk’s lap. kihyun takes the cigarette out of minhyuk’s hand and taps it on the ashtray next to them before taking a drag, considering changkyun’s words, putting up a fight even though he and minhyuk know changkyun will get his way at the end of the day. “i’ll even let you dress me up.”

“oh.” is all kihyun says before leaning in and taking changkyun’s lips. the angle is uncomfortable, minhyuk can tell this much as he watches them get tangled in each other. he takes the cigarette from kihyun’s hand and finally inhales a deep drag from it, never taking his eyes off of them. there’s something enticing and irresistible about watching changkyun get lost in what he wants — but never truly letting go of his power over it — while kihyun bends and molds him as he wishes.

they part quickly though, kihyun stops kissing changkyun and distances himself just to watch the other go and try to chase his lips, his whole face painted with need while kihyun smiles down at him. “that’s settled then. no take backs.” and he looks up at minhyuk, waiting for his final word.

“you made a deal with the devil, darling. you should know better.” minhyuk caresses changkyun’s cheek and gives a little peck on his pouty lips. “and i have no choice but to agree with kihyun on this one.”

changkyun is not really upset about it, he already knows what kihyun likes to see him in and he has no problem with it, but he also knows kihyun likes to get on his nerves a bit so he gives him that much. they both watch as he excitedly goes back the their room, talking to the walls about how they should go to the amusement park sometime soon. he may seem gloomy at times, but truth is kihyun is just as bad as minhyuk and changkyun, and they both are well aware of that. he likes cherry lollipops and lace and putting on lipstick when he’s in a good mood. he wakes up early just to make them breakfast and sneak his way between them on their shared bed when he’s done, cold fingers against their back always waking them up by surprise. he’s sweet in a maniac kind of way you wouldn’t expect by just listening to him talk about how the writers during the second phase of romanticism got it all right.

“he’s right you know?” changkyun turns his attention to minhyuk. he stretches and grabs his robe from where it’s laying beside them, slipping it on delicately before continuing. “we should go to the amusement park soon so you can win one of those gigantic bears for me.” he smiles so sweetly it makes minhyuk wonder if changkyun isn’t really an angel. sure, a corrupted one with the way he’s dressing, but an angel still shining down on him in all his glory and sin.

minhyuk gets lost in all the ways he could compare changkyun to religion and the only thing that pulls him from it it’s the way the music abruptly changes into something mellow and slow and not-like-changkyun at all. it’s nice, he thinks. nice in a way that makes him remember of when they had first met, changkyun covered in blood and frightened and so trusting minhyuk would help him. he used to have terrible nightmares back then and minhyuk would hold him, even during the summer when it would get too hot and uncomfortable to do so, night after night like a prayer, as did kihyun, while they exchanged a look that said — _we can’t let him get hurt. ever._

minhyuk lost count on how many times he had stayed up all night, watching changkyun sleep, holding his hand, and then after a while watching kihyun give in to sleep too, hand splayed over changkyun’s stomach, both of them looking small and fragile. he was always left with the thought and uneasy feeling on his stomach he would lose them. it made him numb and distant in a way he knew it hurted them and he hated himself for being so insecure.

but if changkyun was religion, kihyun was a whole galaxy by himself, all bright colors and dark spaces in between. a mystery laying itself out and waiting to be discovered at every corner, every freckle on his back. minhyuk knows he never planned on surviving after throwing himself in front of his car, knows there’s something behind the way kihyun just laughed and laughed and laughed when he was getting beaten up by minhyuk, blood painting his teeth, but never got around to question him about it. he wants to ask him about his nightmares too, so violent they wake changkyun up at night sometimes, the younger looking at minhyuk asking for directions on what to do about it. truth is, minhyuk doesn’t have a clue. he just asks changkyun to switch places so kihyun can be in the middle and holds his hand, caresses it until the frown on his face disappears. kisses his temple and sings low and steady him back to better dreams while changkyun runs his fingers absently minded through the short hair on kihyun’s nape.

and minhyuk… minhyuk was there. that’s his role in this whole thing. he was there when changkyun needed someone to help him escape because no one would believe he killed the guy in self defense. he was there when kihyun decided to end his life just to have it come back and bite him in the ass. some deity stubborn on keeping him alive after so many tries just to spite him, as he would say. he was there and open and convenient and he doesn’t blame them for sticking around. he has stolen more than enough to keep the three of them safe and hidden away somewhere, and would probably steal more if that meant they wouldn’t leave. but the thing is — living in constant fear the things he loves and cherishes the most in the world could just wake up one day and runaway together because they don’t really need him anymore is wearing him out more than he would like to admit.

changkyun is observing him, he’s well aware of that. he’s probably waiting for a reaction on the song change and he’ll probably never know the true one, but minhyuk supposes he could humour him a bit. “wanna dance, darling?” he asks him as he gets up from the couch and stubbs the cigarette down on the ashtray. he gets closer and extends his hand to the younger boy, the music coming to an end, soon after being replaced by something that sounds almost the same, but sweeter in an aggressive passive way. “i know how much you like to dance and i don’t dance with you nearly enough, so… would you give me the honour?”

changkyun’s eyes turn into little slits as he cocks his head to the side looking at minhyuk like he _sees_ him. like he watched the little film of their time together unfold on minhyuk’s mind and he heard every insecurity that came together as a subtitle almost. he crosses his arms across his chest and talks as soon as the tambourine makes an appearance on the song. “i guess.”

minhyuk wastes no time before he’s sliding his hand around changkyun’s waist, holding his hand with the other and they start to sway gently. minhyuk knows he’s better at dancing than kihyun, has heard changkyun complain more than once about getting his feet constantly stomped. it never stopped him, though. he loved dancing with kihyun in a reckless kind of way that would end up with them laying on the carpet, changkyun on top of kihyun kissing him until they were both breathless and laughing. minhyuk thinks he specially loves them when they’re like that.

the lyrics ringing through their living room match how minhyuk feels about changkyun in a way he was never able to put in words. the melody feels like it’s embracing him but more so than that, compelling him to pay attention to the way it unfolds. the lyrics could be considered obscene in an innocent kind of way, describing how the woman wears red lingerie but the thing that pulls the guy under is her eyes. minhyuk wants to look changkyun in the eyes in that moment and try to convey how much he truly loves him, but he’s resting his chin on minhyuk’s shoulder and it’s _so_ _sweet_ — exactly like the song says — and minhyuk feels once again flowers grow inside of him in places he deemed were scorched earth, never fertile again.

“i know you’re waiting for us to leave, minhyuk.” changkyun says and although his words are harsh and heavy on minhyuk’s heart, his voice sounds like velvet should feel on your hands. it’s a slap and a caress at the same time. “you can be vulnerable too, you know? we won’t let you fall if that’s what you’re so afraid of.”

“i’m not afraid.” the words come easily enough out of minhyuk’s lips. he never lies to his boys, he omits just enough to protect them from things they don’t have to worry about. he remembers vaguely then kihyun reading him something about lying to yourself being the worst kind of lie there is one afternoon, while sitting on his lap, and the sour taste of regret fills his mouth.

“then why are you shaking, sweetheart?” changkyun is finally looking him in the eyes and minhyuk would rather he wasn’t. there’s no pity behind them, just love and concern and he doesn’t know how to deal with it. he’s good at loving others, giving himself away. he doesn’t know how to be loved back.

kihyun was watching them from afar, leaning against the door threshold, arms crossed over his chest. he got curious on why the house had been so quiet suddenly when he felt like being loud for the three of them, excitement barely contained, and had come to take a look. he sees the exact moment minhyuk breaks at changkyun’s words. he doesn’t know exactly what changkyun said, but he had recognized the empty look in minhyuk’s eyes as soon as he spoke. he walks past changkyun, who had his back turned to him, and hugs minhyuk from behind by the waist. he nuzzles his neck and gets inebriated on his scent before kissing it gently. “have you got any idea how much i love you?” he says, one hand coming up from minhyuk’s waist just so he can touch minhyuk’s undercut — one fingertip after the other just to be sure he leaves all his fingerprints there, a soft kind of possession only kihyun is capable of. “how much _we_ love you?” his stare is focused on changkyun now.

“i do.” minhyuk says, and it’s so low and small they wouldn’t have been able to hear him at all if they weren’t standing so close like this.

“i don’t think you do.” kihyun is quick to respond. “i don’t think you know just how beautiful i think you are, how smart. you’re never selfish and i always get surprised by that. you _saved_ _me_ , minhyuk, and still you don’t give yourself enough credit for it.” minhyuk tries to interrupt him but he speaks over it. “you’re amazing like those little flowers that are stubborn enough to try and grow during the harshest of winters and i could grow an entire garden of you. i have, actually. sometimes there’s just so much of you and changkyun inside of me i get scared. i smile at children on the street now because of you, i go out and enjoy the sun and i’m happy.” he stops then, thinking carefully of his next words and if they should be said at all. “i also know how to steal a car. it can’t be all good habits, right?” and minhyuk laughs. it sounds more like a screech than a laugh, but kihyun will take anything he can get. changkyun is laughing alongside him and he feels glad to be alive. kihyun is still restless at heart but minhyuk and changkyun help, and that’s more than he could ask for.

“i just hope the bad habit you get from changkyun isn’t being expensive.” minhyuk says after he stops laughing, completely relaxed now between the both of them. “or emotional slutty.” he adds as an afterthought and kihyun could kiss him for it.

“hey! stop this slander.” changkyun sounds so offended it’s even funnier than before. “i got that from _you_ . you’re the emotional slut here.” and minhyuk takes no offense really. changkyun wouldn’t sound threatening even to a child. actually he sounds exactly like a child sometimes — if said child was an introvert that spills random facts all the time, who can’t get enough of learning and half heartedly threatens them while cutting their hair saying _“you know i have a pair of scissors in my hands and i’m not afraid to use it.”_.

“strange ‘cause i’m pretty sure i got that from _you_.” minhyuk turns his head just so he can kiss kihyun’s cheek. a _thank you for loving me_ in its physical form.

“i’m sorry, minhyuk. i shouldn’t have asked.” is what changkyun tells him next, surprising him. he’s looking at his feet like they’re the most interesting thing on earth. “i just… i wanted to make sure you knew. i try not to feed all these expectations and scenarios i make up in my head — ‘cause truth is i don’t need to know everything about you, but it’s really hard keeping my mouth shut when i see you struggling. so i wanted you to know.” he looks up when minhyuk’s hand touches his cheek, right over the acne scars he hates so much. “i won’t leave. me and kihyun don’t plan on running away together ‘cause it’s us three. _it’ll always be us three_. and i know words aren’t enough and there will be times you’ll get insecure again but… let us help. _let us in_ , just like we let you.” as he finishes kihyun smiles at him like he’s proud and the anxious feeling in changkyun’s chest dies down a bit.

minhyuk keeps caressing changkyun’s cheek and wishes time would stop for them right in this moment. little specks of dust dance around them, only visible because of the sunlight that is shining down on the living room. the curtains flutter softly as a summer breeze invades the space. changkyun’s skin is shining, kihyun smells like roses and he feels loved. “thank you, darling.” is all he manages to say, trying his best not to ruin this memory he’s sure he’ll come to need in the future.

the rest of their day is spent tangled up with each other, dancing awkwardly, but sweetly at the same time, to a tune only them can hear — it’s the perfect mix of their hearts beating together in unison and their breaths mingling between shared kisses.

 

—

 

they’re on the run again, hiding away in cheap motels where the beds are way too small for three people, but they still manage to sleep together. they know better than call anything but each other home so it’s ok. it’s ok when changkyun complains about his feet being uncovered during the night because kihyun won’t stop moving in his sleep and it’s ok too that kihyun swears changkyun off when he tries to dye his hair some crazy shade of pink. it’s ok minhyuk has more than he can count mosquito bites all over his body because the windows don’t close properly and apparently his blood is their ambrosia.

it’s ok that changkyun locked himself in the bathroom an hour ago and refuses to leave. minhyuk and kihyun aren’t worried at all. “changkyun, what are you doing there? i need to take a piss.” minhyuk, always subtle minhyuk. “also kihyun is worried.”

“i’m what?” kihyun looks at him with an outraged scowl. it’s not a lie per se but he clearly woke up in a bad mood today and minhyuk is pushing his luck.

“ok. he can come in first then.” changkyun says impatiently as he opens the door not nearly enough and extends his hand, making a grabby gesture. “c’mon. hurry up, ki.”

kihyun grabs changkyun’s hand and is pulled so quickly into the bathroom, minhyuk isn’t able to distinguish if changkyun had all his members still in place by the blur he saw. if he still has them, though, he’s pretty sure kihyun will have done something to change that once they’re out of the bathroom.

minhyuk can’t do much but sit on their bed and wait for whatever it is changkyun is up to now to be done. maybe he’s shaving again and needed help, so now the surprise is ruined and he’s whining about it to kihyun. maybe he’s painting his toenails and got bored with no one inside to talk to. maybe he’s crying and doesn’t want minhyuk to see it, although his voice sounded more annoyed than sad. maybe they figured out it was minhyuk’s birthday and they’re gonna come out with a cake and throw it on his face for hiding it from them. the possibilities are endless but minhyuk’s patience isn’t so he knocks on the door after twenty minutes that felt like a little eternity for him.

“if you guys don’t come out in the next five minutes i’m calling the police and running away before changkyun even has time to realize there’s no silk in prison and kihyun starts to regret ever getting affiliated with us.” he masks his impatience so well he thinks about giving his own back a little pat. the true voice of a conman that has honed his abilities to the point he could even fool himself.

“stop being dramatic.” kihyun yells but his voice is muffled by the door separating them. he opens it and peeps his head through the crack, a towel wrapped around it. “you’re stealing my brand, sweetheart.”

“i could never steal your brand, baby. you’re so good at being dramatic i pity the academy for losing such a talented actor.” minhyuk smiles as he says it, sweetness and sarcasm dripping from his tone. “what are you guys up to?”

“you’ll see. sit down and be a good boy for us, will you?” kihyun tries his best to resemble minhyuk’s tone when he says it. “you can come in in five minutes, right kyunie?” he looks back into the bathroom and smiles sheepishly.

“he can come in now, actually. i’m all done.” is the reply that follows. changkyun sounds different and minhyuk can’t quite pinpoint what’s going on. it leaves his legs feeling wobbly as he goes into the bathroom.

what he sees leaves him stunned for a good whole minute. changkyun looks… stunning. he’s sitting by the tub, all kinds of hair products neatly placed over a chair by his side, and his hair is black. black like an undiscovered part of the ocean or the night sky when it’s cloudy and you can barely even see the moon.

“you’re… your hair… it’s…” minhyuk can’t seem to form coherent sentences. he hears kihyun laughing softly near his ear as he embraces him.

“he looks pretty, right?” kihyun whispers and minhyuk’s hair at the back of his neck stands up. it’s more a statement than a question, but minhyuk stills nods dumbfounded. “do you wanna know what i look like too?” and for a second minhyuk had totally forgot kihyun had been hiding his hair with a towel when they were talking.

“you both always look stunning, but yes. show me, baby.” he says as he frees himself from kihyun’s arms and goes to stand against the sink, positioning himself between both boys.

kihyun grabs the towel by its end and starts pulling it down slowly. minhyuk can see his hair is darker, that much he can make up, but it’s still wet so that could be it too. “i know i said i would never let kyunnie paint my hair, but he was compelling. i have no idea what he has done, though. he won’t let me look in the mirror until he’s done.” kihyun pouts adorably and minhyuk wonders if it’s possible to fall in love for the first time everyday.

“i’m almost done.” changkyun says, his eyes rolling at kihyun’s tone. minhyuk knows better than to hurry changkyun’s process by now, but apparently kihyun doesn’t. “and besides, you would hate yourself if you ruined your own surprise before i was finished.” changkyun’s cheeks go red suddenly and his eyes drop to the floor. “i’m glad you liked it, by the way. it’s been a long time since i had any natural color in my hair. i used to hate it when i was younger.” his fingers play with the longer locks on the back of his head and they look so soft minhyuk wants to reach out and touch them by himself.

“you should finish kihyun’s hair, darling.” is all minhyuk says before falling silent again and observing them both move at his words.

changkyun is good at what he does. there’s gentleness and love in every little touch he gives kihyun’s hair and minhyuk can clearly see he’s in his element. he’s focused, but he still stops now and then to bicker with kihyun who refuses to stop moving, too eager for the whole thing to end already. “quit it, kihyun. i’m gonna shave your whole head if you don’t stop moving.” and just like that, as soon as he hears the shaving machine, kihyun goes still and quiet. changkyun turns it off and resumes blow drying kihyun’s hair, looking like the cat who got the cream.

it doesn’t take much longer before changkyun is bringing the little mirror he carries around out of a bag minhyuk hadn’t notice was behind him this whole time. changkyun winks at him and hands the mirror to kihyun.

“i’m still… blonde?” are the first words that leave kihyun’s mouth. he sounds oddly disappointed but relieved at the same time. “i thought i would end up with… i don’t know? purple hair, maybe.”

“maybe next, darling. if that’s what you want.” changkyun crosses his arms where he’s standing next to minhyuk. “do you like it?”

“i do. it’s darker than my original shade, but it strangely suits me better. and thank you for not giving me an undercut. i know how bad you wanted that.” kihyun hands the mirror back to changkyun who’s laughing.

“well… like i said. we always have next time.” and there’s a promise hidden in changkyun’s words. it’s almost a threat if you were to ask minhyuk, who’s watching their little moment unfold.

“what do you think?” he almost misses kihyun’s question. “do i look prettier now?”

“prettier than this morning, but less than you’ll be tomorrow when you wake up.” minhyuk answers and goes to kiss him. he starts on his forehead, a little peck, barely there, and goes down slowly until he reaches his lips and kihyun is almost desperate for it.

changkyun clears his throat when he notices they’re getting too caught up in each other. “i hate to get in the way of you guys, but i still want to get my hands on minhyuk’s hair.” they split and look at changkyun with spit slicked lips. “and kihyun, if you would be so kind and assist me, i’d be thankful.” he doesn’t sound like changkyun since this whole ordeal began and it should be weird, but they both think it’s endearing how serious he can get when he’s confident on what he’s doing.

“where do you want me then?” minhyuk says after giving kihyun’s lips one last peck. “by the tub so it won’t make too much of a mess?”

“when have i _ever_ cared about making a mess?” changkyun’s response is everything but innocent and it makes minhyuk laugh, incredulous at his cheekiness. ‘’but yeah, i suppose. exchange places with kihyun and…ki?” kihyun gets up and looks at him. “get the bleach, please.”

kihyun goes to do what changkyun asked him silently, leaving them both alone in the bathroom. changkyun asks minhyuk to sit down on the floor and throw his head back so he can wash his hair. it’s so good, the feeling of changkyun’s nails scraping down his scalp, massaging it slowly, he thinks he could sleep like this if his neck wasn’t killing him.

soon enough he’s done, kihyun’s back and silence still dances softly around them in a way it only seems to to people who have known each other for years. it’s comfortable and minhyuk doesn’t feel the need to talk just to fill the holes, because there aren’t any.

changkyun bleaches his already bleached hair quickly saying he doesn’t need much more than that for the color he has prepared. minhyuk rests his head in one of changkyun’s thighs and thinks about how the hell did he get the money to buy all this stuff if minhyuk himself is the one that manages it and doesn’t remember changkyun asking for money.

“kyunie, how did you buy all this stuff?” kihyun beats him to it, scratching his head and looking around as changkyun had asked him to get yet another thing he has no idea what it is.

“you see... minhyuk taught me how to pick a lock ages ago and he doesn’t hide his money very well.” changkyun answers, his facial expression one of pure pride at himself.

“i taught you that in case you ever needed to get out of handcuffs!” minhyuk looks up at changkyun sitting in the tub’s edge, mixing hair dye until it reaches just the right shade, not a worry in the world. “not for you to steal from me, changkyun.”

“technically, the money is _ours_ , as _you_ always remind us.” changkyun puts the bowl he’s using to mix on his other thigh, cleaning the excess of hair dye on it’s edge before continuing. “and like, they’re looking for a red haired guy… so i was actually thinking about _our safety_ when i decided to dye _my_ hair. yours is just my boyfriends enabling me because they love me very much.” he taps lightly on minhyuk’s forehead as to make him straight up so he can start to dye his hair and minhyuk finds himself complying easily — too easily if you asked him.

kihyun sometimes laughs in a way only his shoulders shake a bit and there isn’t really a sound leaving his mouth, but his lips are stretched wide in a smile so big it makes his eyes look like little crescent moons. changkyun calls it his “pleased little shit” smile and that’s exactly what he’s doing as he looks at minhyuk. “ _i told you_.” and minhyuk can hear the satisfaction behind his tone in just three little words. “you spoiled him.”

minhyuk is rendered speechless before he can counter kihyun’s accusation by changkyun slowly spreading the cold dye on his hair. there’s something about people playing with his hair that always get minhyuk to transcend to a state of peace and quiet, and now is no different. he closes his eyes and basks in the attention, changkyun’s fingers and kihyun’s stare — that he can feel accurately even though he doesn’t see it —, in the silence that once again is comfortable and assuring. kihyun eventually gets bored of it and starts humming some song he doesn’t seem able to recognize but it’s ok. everything is ok.

as changkyun finishes and tells him enough time passed and they can now wash his hair, minhyuk thinks distantly he should hide his money somewhere else after this whole thing is done, but that he is also glad that changkyun — and kihyun who doesn’t sing often enough, even though he should because it’s minhyuk’s favorite lullaby and he sounds like an angel —, gave him the best birthday present not even knowing it was his birthday to begin with.

changkyun trims minhyuk’s hair here and there and kihyun is transfixed by the way he’s working, the sound of the scissors filling the bathroom in a way that’s soothing as well. “he looks amazing, right?” changkyun stops and compares two hair tips before cutting them so they’re equal.

“he looks… charming?” kihyun knits his eyebrows like he’s thinking hard, too hard, and still can’t collect his thoughts and express them in the right way. he’s staring at minhyuk like he’s a project kihyun can’t wait to get his hands on. “he always does. you always do, darling. but put him in a leather jacket and black pants. maybe mess with his hair a little. do you see what i’m going for?” kihyun looks at changkyun from where he’s standing in front of minhyuk, waiting for his reply.

“oh.” changkyun exhales softly as he says it. he gestures to kihyun to hand him the blow dryer and they both fall silent again. minhyuk is dying to ask them _what the fuck do they mean_ but he supposes he can be patient — make changkyun happy he’s not asking any questions about what he’s doing and trusting him completely. changkyun starts drying his hair and is done soon after, way quicker than he was with kihyun who just has… a lot of hair. good for pulling, not so much for taking care of.

“here.” kihyun hands him the little mirror, and changkyun rests his hands on his shoulders as he grabs it.

“i wanna see your face when you see it.” changkyun replies as minhyuk looks up at him. “it’s my favorite part of doing this.”

minhyuk takes a look at himself and then turns the mirror to look at changkyun, who’s smiling down at him. “i love it, darling.” and minhyuk means it. his hair is styled just the way he likes it, it’s kind of unruly and maybe to other people it would appear like it’s just a mess, but he likes it and that’s all that matters. besides that, the color — a darker shade of grey with purple undertones — really matches his complexion and he couldn’t be happier. “thank you.”

“happy birthday, sweetheart.” changkyun whispers in his ear and winks at him through the mirror. “i’m glad you liked it.”

minhyuk is left stunned at the younger’s words and almost misses kihyun leaving the bathroom quickly just come back with a little cupcake with a candle on it. “happy birthday, you asshole. we love you.”

minhyuk blows the candle on top of the cupcake and he can’t seem able to suppress the smile that’s making his cheeks hurt. “how did you guys find out?” it’s not that he was actively hiding his birthday from them, minhyuk loves birthdays — he just hates his. too many lonely ones to count from memory staining his judgment about it.

“remember when we went to that café and they had those computers down the back and you said _“don’t use them, they could track us down or something.”_? i used them when you went to the bathroom to google your birthday since you never told us.” comes kihyun reply. “your facebook page is embarrassing by the way. you should’ve deleted that when you had the chance.”

minhyuk has terrible flashbacks of his profile photo and posts in general. he had made that profile when he was young and dumb, thought that money would buy him some kind of peace and acceptance in this world. kihyun must have seen him holding stacks of stolen cash and using those terrible ray bans. so much so for his reputation, he guesses.

“turns out i was right. you always gave me the scorpio vibes.” changkyun says as he starts to gather his things neatly. “maybe some other time tell me at what time you were born so i can make your full birth chart.”

“no way i’m letting you do that, you evil aquarius boy.” minhyuk shakes his head at changkyun and laughs. “i don’t need you to see right through me more than you already do.” he knows changkyun will probably trick him into telling him sooner or later, but he thinks about giving that information as a birthday present to the boy along with something pretty and shiny — just like him.

“in retrospective maybe i shouldn’t have given him mine.” kihyun says and regrets paints his voice even if it’s just a little bit.

“maybe you shouldn’t have.” is all changkyun says before giving them a both a kiss and leaving the bathroom.

while he tries to share his cupcake in three equal parts, sitting on the bed with his boys, minhyuk thinks it’s the first birthday he wishes he’ll never forget.


	2. kihyun.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kihyun feels like red roses, soft and pretty, but positively dangerous when you get too close to its thorns.

kihyun is having one of those days he wishes he hadn’t woken up. they stole a car earlier from the motel they were staying in and he loves minhyuk, he really does, but he just had to choose the one car which was probably older than all their ages combined. so now here they were, stuck at an old gas station with a flat tire.

“i don’t understand a thing about cars but i’m pretty sure no matter how much you kick that tire it won’t suddenly make it full again.” he says, leaning against the trunk. he thinks about unloading their things from the back and front seat and just walking to the nearest populated town.

“would you be a darling and open up that trunk for me?” minhyuk asks him while crouching next to the tire, completely ignoring his snarky remark. “see if there’s any tools and a spare tire in there, please.”

“throw me the keys, changkyun.” he asks the younger, who’s currently laying in between the driver and the passenger’s seat. “or else i can’t open this old thing.”

changkyun gets up slowly and reaches for the keys in the ignition. “here. good luck.” and just like that he throws himself, like he threw the keys to kihyun, on the seats again. “hey, you got any lollipops left?” he asks, searching blindly for them on kihyun’s things that are under the seat.

“yeah, you can have the last one.” kihyun tells him as he makes his way to the back of the car again.

“ooh! cherry flavored, my favorite.” changkyun exclaims as he’s finally able to find it and kihyun can’t help but smile.

the keyhole is rusted, because of course it is, but kihyun still manages to open it with a little effort and what he finds inside is definitely better than tools and a spare tire. he pulls the travel bag from inside the trunk and goes to throw it at minhyuk’s feet almost skipping like a little bunny in his excitement. “no tools, but hey! look at this beautiful bag. i think it’s real leather.”

minhyuk is ready to tell him that that isn’t really helpful when he takes a look at said bag. “beautiful indeed. that was in our trunk?” he asks, smiling wide from where he’s standing up at kihyun.

“why are you enabling him, i thought you’d curse him out for thinking about fashion when we- is that money?” changkyun all but yells as soon as the bag is in his field of vision. “is that money or kihyun bought lollipops with drugs in it?”

“that’s definitely money and no drugs in my lollipops. don’t need that ruining their flavor.” kihyun responds, laughing at changkyun’s eyes comically open wide still staring at the money. “like i said before, a beautiful bag. at least now minhyuk can stop worrying about his next stealing around.”

kihyun hates it when minhyuk leaves them in the middle of the night. hates it even more to see changkyun cry quietly until minhyuk’s return. they both know it’s needed, neither of them can actually get a proper job, and the last time minhyuk let them tag along it resulted in every possible form of news broadcasting their faces and names everywhere. minhyuk still blames himself for it. finding that much money means they’ll have at least three more months without having to worry about anything — more so if they stop buying everything their hearts desire — and kihyun quietly thanks whatever god is out there and on their side.

changkyun reaches for the bag, carefully picking a fifty dollar bill and throwing at kihyun. “there, buy yourself some lollipops.” kihyun raises his eyebrows at that, laugh barely contained. “my treat.” changkyun winks at him as he says it.

minhyuk laughs incredulous. “well, that surely solves the money problem, but we still don’t have a way of getting out of here.” he remembers them. when he’s in serious mode he looks older. kihyun thinks he looks like someone’s dad and quickly erases that trail of thought — he doesn’t want to be fucking anyone’s dad.

“there was an amusement park not too far up the road, you guys remember?” changkyun looks at them, excitement brimming in his eyes. “we can walk there, steal some loser’s car _and_ kihyun gets to dress us up like he wanted to ages ago. it’s a win-win situation, right?”

“when you put it like that…” kihyun looks expectedly at minhyuk. “if you say yes, i’ll even carry our things. i think i saw an abandoned bathroom just behind the gas station we can use.”

“i don’t know. i don’t think is safe walking around right now, we could get caught. dressed up by you? it doubles our chances.” minhyuk counters back. kihyun knows he’s ruining the fun out of concern but it’s been so long since they’ve been anywhere but cheap motels and the inside of a car. he’s itching to see people and _be seen_.

“we’ll mingle just fine. i promise you.” he tries bargaining. “changkyun will only ride the ferris wheel once. you’ll win him a big bear, and i’ll buy him some flowers somewhere, i don’t know.” minhyuk looks at him like he wants to say yes, but his answer will remain no. “please, minnie. i beg you.”

“don’t come running when a rat walks over your feet in that dirty bathroom or a spider crawls on your arm.” minhyuk gathers the note that changkyun had thrown at kihyun before and grabs the bag from the floor along with it. “i’ll dress myself up, thank you. but have fun with kyunie.”

kihyun could scream in excitement, if he was that sort of guy. instead he grabs changkyun’s hand a little too tight and smiles as wide as he can. “come on, kyunie. go ahead, i’m gonna get all we’re going to need.”

“why do i gotta go alone?” changkyun pouts at him adorably, making that baby voice he thinks gets him everything he wants and he’s absolutely right about it.

“because if there are rats i don’t want them anywhere near my shoes.” kihyun responds like that’s completely ok. “and i want to have a little talk with the man, if you know what i mean.”

“yeah, yeah. sacrifice the weaker.” changkyun starts walking off, hands pointing at the sky like it offended him personally. “you’re lucky your mouth feels like heaven or i’d have left your ass ages ago.”

as kihyun gathers different outfits, his little bag of makeup and searches for the hidden lollipop in between the back seats, minhyuk waits patiently against the trunk where he hid the money again. he thinks he can almost listen to the carrousel spinning slowly, the tune akin to something you’d hear in those little ballerina music boxes, even though they’re this far out from the park. he looks up to the sky and sighs deeply, lost in thought momentarily.

“be a darling and put on what i left for you in the front seat.” kihyun touches minhyuk’s arm gently as he says it. “i know you’re worried, but indulge me a bit, would you?”

“i think i’ll just ruin whatever aesthetic it is you visualized me in, but sure.” kihyun hears the self doubt behind minhyuk’s words and it pains him. of course he would fit kihyun’s aesthetic, he’s part of it. “go. changkyun is probably thinking about adopting said rat by now out of boredom.”

“thank you.” kihyun kisses minhyuk’s lips tenderly and starts walking in the direction of the bathroom.

he can hear changkyun talking and he can only hope minhyuk was wrong. he starts walking faster, barely making it without dropping the clothes from his shoulders, and mentally curses himself for almost ruining his favorite lace shirt by stepping on it. he’s ready to make a big entrance by kicking the door and scaring changkyun, but the bathroom appears to have no door. _great_.

“i hope you’re not talking to the rats.” he says as he walks in, shoulders slumped.

“nah, just talking to the walls. the bathroom is kinda clean actually.” kihyun looks at changkyun pointing around from where he is standing leaning against a sink. besides the dust and not having a door, the bathroom does look organized enough compared to the gas station. there are two sinks on one side, three stalls right in front of them, all with their doors intact, and a big mirror in the back which is covered in dust but not broken as far as kihyun can see. like everything in his life lately, not exactly what he had in mind but perfect nonetheless.

“you can put the makeup bag in that sink behind you.” he hands changkyun the bag and quickly goes to climb one of the toilets so he can inspect if the dividers are clean enough to hang their clothes.

“i can clean them for you.” changkyun offers as he watches, endeared, the older boy balancing himself on the toilet. they’re probably around the same height, but changkyun always thought there was something about kihyun that made him look smaller.

“it’s okay, i’ll put them over the toilet or something. i don’t know why i even bothered to check.” kihyun replies, carefully putting his feet on the ground. “i guess i’m nervous about your reactions.”

“why?” changkyun is surprised by the elder. it’s not that kihyun doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve, it’s more so that he usually is pretty confident about these things. “when have we not?”

he turns and smiles at changkyun, clasps his hands together and there’s a spark behind his eyes changkyun knows means trouble. “shall we begin?”

kihyun is very particular about these things. he knows what he likes and he knows exactly what he wants to see changkyun in. the younger hardly ever complains about his vision, but today he’s afraid he’s going to push him a bit too far out of his comfort zone. “thoughts on red lipstick?”

“minhyuk is gonna kill you.” changkyun replies and that’s not exactly a yes or a no, but kihyun will take it.

“great. see through shirt and a leather jacket with skinny jeans?” he goes on and can already envision what changkyun will look like. his thighs being hugged just the right way, that neither he or minhyuk can take their eyes off of. his chest on show, but not so much as to just tease whoever is looking at him. maybe even a dangling earring if he feels like it when he’s done.

“minhyuk is _definitely_ going to kill you.” changkyun laughs and starts undressing. “but i’m in as long as it’s all black. we still gotta be able to not stand out too much.” kihyun is distracted by the way he opens one button at a time slowly, like he’s giving him a private show in some fancy hotel room and not in the middle of an abandoned gas station. not even the gas station, but the bathroom _behind_ it.

“yeah. i don’t want anything taking the attention off the main attraction.” kihyun reigns himself in. they’ll have time later. at least he hopes they will.

as changkyun finishes unbuttoning his shirt, he lets it fall to the ground like it hadn’t cost them someone’s rent. he goes to open his pants next, looking kihyun dead in the eyes, and kihyun chooses to ignore him in favor of getting him his new clothes before he gets tired of this little show, gets cold and starts complaining.

he comes back to an almost naked changkyun and hands him the black pants, the one with holes on its knees that he knows that get a little too tight on changkyun, and — after thinking he had forgotten it back in the car — the see through shirt.

“where’s the jacket?” changkyun asks as he grabs the clothes quickly. he starts dressing himself and stops to take one look at the mirror before kihyun interrupts him.

“no.” changkyun’s head immediately turns to look at kihyun who has his arms crossed over his chest, a stern look on his face. “wait until i’m done with you.” he continues, pleased at himself for finally getting revenge at changkyun for making him wait when he had dyed his hair. “and you’re getting the old man’s jacket when we get back to the car.”

“that reminds me. what’s he going to wear?” changkyun carefully puts on the shirt and kihyun feels all the air getting knocked out of him. he already looks amazing and he’s not even done with him yet.

“oh.” he laughs. he can’t help to once the thought of minhyuk with his eyes wide and confusion painting his face crosses his mind. “you’ll see.”

he walks towards the sink and starts fumbling inside his bag, getting the right foundation for changkyun’s skin tone along with some eyeliner. he doesn’t take the lipstick out of it just yet, just leaves it on top of everything else. yeah, he may have told changkyun about it but what if he didn’t take him seriously? he’s not gonna make him wear it if he’s not comfortable with it. he can live with just his fantasies about it and call it a day.

“come here, baby.” and changkyun complies, standing against the sink, lowering himself just enough so kihyun can do his makeup.

“why red lipstick?” changkyun asks even though he knows he should stay as quiet as possible and not disturb kihyun in moments like this. he would be lying if he said he wasn’t curious, but changkyun is also curious about most things in this world, so kihyun will probably not get surprised by it or too annoyed about him asking.

“the first time i watched you eating one of my lollipops, it was one of the cheap ones that will stain even your teeth if you let them, you know?” kihyun still remembers how bad he had wanted to kiss changkyun that day, but their relationship was still undefined in its defined mutual desire. “you’re messy too, so that was a recipe for trouble, but somehow i didn’t mind it one bit. it was all over your lips, and i remember wondering if you were just trying to mess with us ‘cause no one eats a lollipop like that.”

“i was. you both were being too stubborn about wanting me and doing nothing about it. i’m impatient, what can i say?” he smiles at kihyun and urges him to continue.

“well, like i was saying— close your eyes for me, baby.” he starts applying the eyeliner carefully. “it was all over your lips, kinda looking like you had lipstick on, and you looked beautiful. like the devil himself had put you in my way to test my self control.”

he watches as a smile forms itself on changkyun’s lips, always happy to be praised. “you have zero self control, ki.”

“i have excellent self control, excuse me?” kihyun fakes annoyance. he knows what changkyun is about to say next, but he loves hearing it from the younger’s lips.

“so much so you and minhyuk took turns kissing me and nothing else that night. even though i begged you guys for something, _anything_.” changkyun pouts as he finishes his sentence and kihyun laughs at the memory.

“you can open them now.” he tells changkyun and examines his work. he usually gets the eyeliner right on the first try on himself, but doing it on others always proves to be more difficult than what it seems.

“how do i look?” changkyun asks him, eyes sparkling.

 _perfect. like you came straight out of a painting. like if i had the chance to make you from scratch it still wouldn’t compare to the beauty you hold right in this moment. aphrodite would hunt you down for daring to look prettier than her._ “i’ll let minhyuk’s face talk for myself when he sees you.”

“do i keep my lips open for you or do i just pout them?” changkyun asks, clearly not satisfied by kihyun’s answer.

“you don’t need to if you don’t want, baby. you look amazing as it is. more than that.” kihyun tells him, feeling unsure of himself again. “i know it’s not common and it’s really ok. i won’t be hurt or anything.” he says it all in a rush, like he’s a chastised kid trying to explain himself.

“well, if you’re not doing it, guess i am then.” he turns around slightly and reaches for the lipstick inside kihyun’s bag.

changkyun walks up slowly to the mirror, making sure to move his hips here and there the way he knows makes people stare at his ass, and looks over his shoulder waiting for kihyun to react. he just watches the younger, too focused on the lipstick on changkyun’s hand and what he’s about to do. changkyun leans in closer to the mirror, uncaps the lipstick and opens his lips. he applies it like he’s done it several times before, neatly painting his cupid bow first and spreading it slowly to the sides — completing the heart shape of his upper lip first, and then paying attention the bottom one. kihyun finds himself transfixed by the sight of it. wishes he hadn’t been such a coward and was the one actually doing it.

when changkyun turns to look at him properly, kihyun can feel his heart skip a beat. if he thought changkyun had looked beautiful before, now even the devil would want to fight him. he looked so good he could probably start havoc by just requesting it, and no one in this whole earth would be able to refuse him.

“how do i look now, _darling_?” changkyun says, but it’s more a trap than a question. it’s more a way of putting kihyun against a corner and watch him try to escape. there’s something fun and wicked in making others feel nervous in his presence, something about having control over someone else like that that goes straight to his head and he can’t get enough of it.

“kiss me.” kihyun’s brain manages to put those two words together and calls it a win. it’s enough — his brain already feels overloaded for the rest of the day with pictures of changkyun looking like something straight out of kihyun’s wildest wet dreams.

“nope.” changkyun says and starts to head to the bathroom’s door, or at where should be one. “gonna ruin my lipstick, darling. can’t let that happen before minhyuk sees me.” he says it like it’s nothing. like he’s not purposely trying to punish kihyun for not giving into his desire and trusting that changkyun wanted to do something for him. for the three of them.

kihyun dresses as quickly as he can. puts on his white lace shirt, the one minhyuk innocently thought he would use underneath another shirt to cover his middle, black pants that look a little bit too big on him and slicks his hair back. there. he would blend _perfectly_ in a crowd. minhyuk was crazy to think otherwise.

“shall we go, darling?” he says, looking at changkyun standing in the threshold, waiting for him. he leaves the clothes that they had come into behind, only the little makeup bag in his hand.

“what about our old clothes?” changkyun looks him from top to bottom and smiles. he’s never been shy of showing when he wants something and kihyun just knows changkyun wants him. he never hears the praise but it sticks to him like it was voiced out.

“carrying them would ruin the aesthetic, baby. i almost left my makeup behind too just so i wouldn’t have to carry this little bag and ruin it but…” kihyun sighs deeply, links his arm with changkyun’s. “sometimes you gotta compromise.”

changkyun laughs at kihyun like he’s telling a joke and he doesn’t know if he should feel offended by it or laugh along. he chooses to start walking, pulling changkyun with him by their linked arms. he wishes they had other options of shoes as he approaches the car, sure black loafers are a classic, but he thinks maybe the one from gucci that has fur in it would’ve been more suitable.

minhyuk is waiting for them in an white suit. nothing out of the usual, the elder likes to wears suits now and then. what gets changkyun by surprise though, is realizing his shirt isn’t a shirt. “did you put him in a...?” he looks at kihyun for an answer, his eyes wild like he can’t believe what he’s seeing.

“oh. you can bet i did.” kihyun smiles proudly when he notices too that minhyuk had followed his suggestion.

minhyuk seems to notice their presence and lowers the map he’s holding. it’s just one of those things that changkyun used to mess with him for having, and then thanked the gods later for it when they got lost one night in the middle of nowhere with no phones.

he focuses on kihyun first, his eyes showing all signs of danger, but also something more thick than desire behind them. he opens his mouth once, twice, and doesn’t say a thing. looks at changkyun with what changkyun can only imagine it’d be a look of hope that he looks anything but what he’s looking right now. that look vanishes as quickly as it had appeared on minhyuk’s face and in return one of confusion is now on display.

he stares at changkyun’s lips for too long before saying a thing. “you’re wearing lipstick. in a see through shirt. you,” he points at kihyun. “are wearing white lace. and nothing more to cover- i’m in a cropped top.” he sounds more like he’s trying to process the whole thing than actually trying to convey something. “this is not what i asked for.”

minhyuk breathes deeply, runs his fingers through his hair in an anxious manner. the younger boys don’t know how to react. certainly minhyuk isn’t having the reaction they had hoped so. kihyun still expected him to say something positive about the whole thing when they had first entered the gas station again, but now he wasn’t so sure it was going to happen. “i’m sorry. we can change. you can change.” he says as a way of calming the elder down though he feels something shatter inside of himself as he voices it out.

minhyuk seems to sense kihyun’s distress and quickly tries to lessen it. “no. sweetheart, don’t apologize.” he sighs. “we all look amazing. changkyun looks. i’m not sure there are even words in the dictionary that would be able to describe how good he looks. and you.” minhyuk pauses for a second. “you look like the suicidal angel that god casted out of heaven and has, miraculously, decided to bless me.”

kihyun releases a breath he hadn’t noticed he was holding. changkyun unlinks their arms just so he can hold his hand and squeezes it. “you’re just afraid we won’t blend in, right?” he says looking at minhyuk, trying to help him calm kihyun down.

“yes. changkyun is right.” minhyuk stands in front of kihyun and puts his hand against kihyun’s cheek lightly. he immediately closes his eyes and nuzzles against it. “you did a good job. i loved it.” he laughs a little before continuing. kihyun knows what’s coming. “it’s weird feeling this little breeze now and then on my belly, i’m not gonna lie though.”

kihyun tries to hide his smile on minhyuk’s hand even though he knows it’s no use. “thank you for enabling me.” he opens his eyes and looks at them both. “you too, changkyun.”

“i’m gonna make bored daddies question their sexuality.” changkyun smiles like a little demon. “i should be the one thanking you.”

“we should get going.” minhyuk breaks their little moment and gets away from the two boys, sounding tense. “the sun will set soon and there’s a chance the park could close before we even get there.” he starts walking towards the road not looking back, bag of money slinging from his shoulder like he’s in an 80s mob movie.

“do you think i can borrow his jacket without asking?” changkyun looks at kihyun before he too starts walking.

“that’s not borrowing, that’s stealing.” kihyun turns his back to him, walks two steps more before stopping and turning his head to look at changkyun over his shoulder. “but yes.”

changkyun grabs minhyuk’s leather jacket as quickly as he can from the front seat and closes the car door. he takes one last look at it, like he’s saying goodbye, before he starts running so he can catch up the others. “wait for me! running is not good for the baby, you guys.”

“please stop referring to yourself as a “baby”. it’s weird.” kihyun says once changkyun reaches his side, panting. “minhyuk is walking ahead like he doesn’t want to be seen with us.” kihyun points with his chin and speaks in a hush.

“it’s not like that kihyun.” comes minhyuk reply. “i'm just making sure there are no cops. if there are, we can run before they see us. i’m being careful.”

“if you were wearing one of those ugly hawaiian shirts you’d look like you came straight out of “miami vice”, minhyuk.” changkyun says, trying to change the subject, get them back on a lighter mood again. “and i will stop calling myself “baby” once you do it too, ki.”

“i lack the chains and the cool mustache, unfortunately.” minhyuk answers him, laughing.

kihyun looks appalled. “you guys can’t say you loved what i picked out and then in the next five minutes try to ruin it over a bad cosplay of an awful show.” he says, sounding annoyed. “and me calling you baby it’s not weird, so don’t make it weird, _baby_.”

“minhyuk would look hot with a mustache.” changkyun says, clearly trying to make kihyun relax in all the wrong ways. “i’m not making it weird. you are.”

minhyuk wonders how changkyun is able to maintain two arguments with kihyun at the same time when he’s already tired by the one he’s currently having.

“you think so, darling?” minhyuk looks behind at them, stops walking until the younger boys catch up to him. “maybe i’ll grow it out.”

“maybe i’ll leave your asses and steal all your money, how about that?” kihyun replies, putting some distance between himself and the other two, immediately missing the proximity but wanting to make a point.

“ok. maybe no talking until we get to the park. you guys don’t know how to behave so i’m taking your talking privileges away.” changkyun says and is met with no remarks or snarky comments. _good_ , he thinks.

changkyun is just as good as minhyuk at reading people. he knows minhyuk is concerned, he knows minhyuk’s concern is making kihyun uncertain and anxious. he knows he has to reel the other two in before they go at each other’s throats and regret it later. the thing about them, changkyun thinks, is the fact that they never knew how to behave around “normal” people and yet, they know exactly how to behave around each other. know each other like the back of their hands and at the same don’t know themselves at all — what a beautiful irony.

the park isn’t as far as they thought it would be, and it certainly is still open. they examine it and notice there is a parking lot on the back with maybe five cars, and minhyuk bets they all belong to the employers. there are some kids here and there and they don’t seem fazed at all that the amusement park looks like a horror maze as a whole. the people working on the rides remind minhyuk of the horror movie he saw just last week about how that crazy dude with the chainsaw came to grow and kill people.

“oh look! they sell those creepy masks!” changkyun points at one os the stands as they keep walking now, trying to reach the parking lot.

“of course they do.” kihyun looks at minhyuk and minhyuk knows exactly what he’s thinking, he’s thinking the same. “you should ask them how much they cost, baby. we’ll buy you one later.”

changkyun doesn’t think twice before approaching the guy that’s probably bigger than any of the bodyguards minhyuk has seen — and he had robbed from the mob once. kihyun steps closer to him and minhyuk feels the need to apologize to him for some reason. he knows he’s upset, he just doesn’t know why and his first instinct is thinking it was probably something he had done earlier.

“you should steal the car alone and we’ll meet you back at the gas station. these guys aren’t paying attention to us just yet, but me and changkyun can distract them long enough so you can do it without anyone noticing.” kihyun tells him in a hush, getting some money from the bag on minhyuk’s shoulder.

“that’s dangerous, i don’t like the idea of getting you out of my sight in this place. it gives me the bad kind of chills down my spine.” minhyuk replies. he’s trying to deny kihyun in the softest way possible, trying to protect him even though he knows he doesn’t need protection other than from himself.

“ _let us help, minhyuk._ ” kihyun closes his fists and he looks like a little child throwing a tantrum. minhyuk knows he’s serious and that he shouldn’t laugh, though. “you’re not the only one with something to lose here.” he completely changes his stance then. he looks collected, calm, but his eyes are sad and he doesn’t try to hide it.

“it’s too dangerous. they could follow you. they could beat you up and i’d be too far away to help.” minhyuk tries to reason with him before changkyun comes back.

“it just sounds like we’re unable to defend ourselves. like we’re children.” kihyun takes a deep breath, “like you don’t trust us.”

“let us do it, sweetheart.” changkyun comes back and holds minhyuk’s hand. “whatever it is that kihyun suggested. it’s not like i heard the whole thing ‘cause i wasn’t as far as you guys thought i was, and although kihyun complains you treat us like kids, he does the same to me.” he smiles widely. “but like i said. i didn’t hear a thing.”

minhyuk is glad changkyun exists. he doesn’t agree with him too, but the lights coming from the park shine down on his skin just the right way and kihyun really did a good job. he shouldn’t be surprised by it, because kihyun always does but changkyun looks like he was carved by michelangelo himself in heaven — or hell, who knows? maybe michelangelo was a bad guy — and he can’t help but think kihyun bested himself.

“if this goes wrong i hope they put you both in a very _very_ far away prison from mine.” minhyuk replies and he thinks he sounds too much like his father. scarily so. “and rest assured you guys will be receiving letters every month.”

changkyun and kihyun look at each other and smile. changkyun mainly smiles because minhyuk is always endearing, even when he’s scolding them and being negative, but kihyun feels trustworthy and that’s something that doesn’t always comes to him. he’s glad they both trust in him enough to actually listen to him once in a awhile.

“that’s so romantic. i’m gonna be a convict’s wife.” changkyun says and to anyone else he might sound like he’s playing around but they both knows he’s dead serious.

“you can’t be a convict’s wife for many reasons, but the main one would be probably the fact that you’re going to be in jail too, changkyun.” kihyun says and shakes his head. “also i’m pretty sure minhyuk’s letters would only consist of _“i told you so.”_ in big red letters.”

“i’m glad you know me so well, darling.” minhyuk squeezes changkyun’s hand before letting it go. “if we’re going to do this we should separate now, though. we’ve been standing here for too long and thank god not one of these guys care enough to have found it suspicious, but let’s not push our luck.”

“minhyuk is right. let’s go, kyunie. i’m gonna buy you something.” kihyun says before winking at changkyun and closing the bag on minhyuk’s shoulder without him realizing. for someone who’s a thief he sure does get stolen a lot.

they interlock their arms and start walking, now and then looking behind their backs at minhyuk’s form approaching the parking lot unnoticed. he never looks back at them though, too focused on his job and the character he’s playing. he would always tell them you got to believe the lie you’re selling or otherwise other people won’t — they can see right through your insecurity and stuttering. changkyun always thought he looked hot when he was breaking the law, in a way that criminal by britney spears would play in the back of his head and he imagined himself on the run having to sacrifice himself for his lovers.

“do you still want that horrible mask? or are you too busy having one of your lana del rey’s aesthetic fantasies?” kihyun asks him, pulling him closer to his body.

“are you able to read minds now?” changkyun looks at him genuinely surprised and just a tad bit excited.

“no. you think too loud. like,” kihyun gestures at him. “with your mouth and actually saying what you’re thinking.”

“oh.” changkyun sounds disappointed. “guess eating ass doesn’t give you powers then.” kihyun can’t help but laugh at the younger’s words, so wide changkyun can actually see his silver tooth.

“so, do you want it or not?” kihyun asks him again as they walk closer and closer to the guy who’s selling the masks, but looks much more interested in biting his nails. probably the most unsanitary thing he could do considering the state that the whole park is in, kihyun thinks.

“yeah. the guy offered me this really sweet deal.” changkyun starts explaining. “if i buy three masks he gives me a wig for free. said it’ll compliment the rest of my look.”

kihyun knows the guy didn’t mean it in a lighthearted way or any way that wouldn’t be offensive. he knows changkyun knows that too — too smart for his own good, just really good at pretending he isn’t. knows they have to keep a low profile, try not to ruin their plan that isn’t already that much planned out, but he really wants to punch the asshole’s nose in.

“i’m giving you the money, but you talk to him. i’ll just stay beside you totally quiet. like a statue.” kihyun whispers to him, slipping the money into changkyun’s back pocket, his hand lingering a little bit longer than necessary there.

“you _never_ do that kihyun. you’re unable of keeping your mouth shut when something bothers you, but even more so when someone tries to come for me or minhyuk.” changkyun whispers back. he’s not sure why they’re whispering but he keeps going. “you look like a hamster that has rabies or something. it’s cute.”

“are you saying i can’t?” kihyun asks and eyes him like changkyun had just challenged him and he’s game. changkyun tries to explain himself but is suddenly interrupted by the loud seller.

“oh! look who’s back. do you want that wig, sweet cheeks?” he looks kihyun from top to bottom and laughs. “just had to get your boyfriend to buy it for you, right?”

“we’ll want the three masks yes. and if you’re still offering the wig, sure.” changkyun says, and sounds more serious than kihyun has heard him talk all day. “can i pick the color of the wig?”

the guy doesn’t expect changkyun to answer him like that, all courtesy and no sarcasm whatsoever behind his words, and somehow finds it more amusing. “hey guys, come here. look at this.” he calls from the stand, gesturing to the other employers near them. “he wants to choose the color of the wig he’s getting.”

the guys all start laughing and if it wasn’t such a good diversion from minhyuk in the parking lot, changkyun is certain kihyun would have already cursed them to hell and back. but as he said he would, he remains quiet and still, only sign of irritation being the vein popping on his neck and the way his skin is slowly starting to get red, specially at the tip of his ears. he looks at changkyun and he knows he’s searching for any signs of distress, but changkyun just smiles at him and keeps going.

“i’d like it blonde.” he drops the money on the counter and smiles at the seller, ignoring all the background noise and the commotion he started. “please.”

the guy goes to the back of the stand to get changkyun his things but he seems to be taking forever to do so and kihyun is starting to get restless. changkyun notices the way his foot is nervously hitting against the floor and he makes motion to grab kihyun’s hand. kihyun looks at him when he feels the younger’s fingers lightly grazing his closed fist and relaxes. he unclenches his fist and caresses changkyun fingers lightly, the touch so out of place with their whole situation, like they’re in their own little world and kihyun is thankful for the distraction.

“it’s a shame i only have one female mask, but i guess at least one of you will be wearing the right one. i did search for them for a long time, but we can’t have it all, right?” the guy says as he comes back and hands them to kihyun, giving up on getting a reaction out of changkyun. “and lucky for you,” he points at changkyun without looking at him, just smiling like a maniac at kihyun still. “i only had blonde wigs.”

kihyun takes them from the guy’s hands with much more force than needed and smiles at him. changkyun doesn’t know if he should feel scared or horny, because kihyun looks possibly murderous, but he’s still defending him and that’s hot. “thank you for your kindness.” he pulls changkyun as he says it and starts walking.

“you just can’t give those type of guys an audience. they won’t change. they’ll always be dicks.” changkyun tries to calm kihyun down again as they make their way out of the park. “they only wished they could look as great as we do right now.”

“that’s not the issue, changkyun.” kihyun still sounds mad, but there’s something else behind his voice. “i heard that too many times growing up and as much as we’ve grown and learned not to listen to it, we still do. it still resonates in the back of our minds when we’re too afraid to go out in public the way we want to. kiss wherever we want. ‘cause it got to us... and we don’t want it to get to the ones we love too.” he sighs deeply and changkyun wants to kiss him just to make it all go away.

“thank you for taking such good care of me.” changkyun says after a moment. he knows they’re not too far out from the gas station now and finally his anxiety hits him. “i wish it hadn’t gotten to you too. you’re a beautiful soul, kihyun. you deserve to be proud about who you are in all its singularity and glory.”

kihyun intertwines their fingers gently and smiles. “thank you.” and it’s so low, it sounds so small, changkyun gets the urge to kiss him again and make sure he knows how cute he really is when he’s like that.

what they come to find as soon as they reach the gas station is a very relaxed minhyuk with his feet propped up on the dashboard of the passenger’s seat of their new stolen car. changkyun is pretty sure he’s hallucinating, because minhyuk is inside a black convertible wearing shades — even though is pitch black outside by now — listening to some r&b song. his hand is making weird gestures as to mimic the way the song sounds to him, and that’s the total opposite of the man they saw minutes ago, almost begging for them to lay low and be as cautious as possible.

“are you pretty things lost?” he says, lowering the glasses just enough so they can see his eyes through the rearview mirror. kihyun has this competition going on between him and changkyun since forever to guess if minhyuk is winking or just blinking, and as his eyes blink, they’re both pretty sure minhyuk is winking at them.

“did you steal a convertible just ‘cause i complained about the last car?” kihyun says as looks at the two cars side by side — the differences one too many to start counting. “and how the fuck did you manage to do that and arrive here before we did?”

“you see, the guy who was in charge of watching the cars was too busy sleeping to give a fuck about me. and the guy who owns this car he…” minhyuk laughs a little before continuing. “he was too trustworthy or too dumb — maybe both — to have left his keys in the ignition. probably the easiest car to steal ever.”

“but how did you leave the parking lot? the guy did take forever to hand us the masks, but i was worried we had done a terrible job of helping you.” changkyun says getting the masks and wig out of kihyun’s hands just to throw them in the back seat.

“what do i always tell you guys?” minhyuk asks but they all know it’s not really a question. “a good thief never shares his secrets.”

kihyun and changkyun exchange looks and start laughing like they can read each other’s minds, it sometimes drives minhyuk crazy how they can connect just like that. he supposes it’s not too far fetched from what kihyun or changkyun feel when they’re the ones left out on the joke, but still, he had gone through the job of stealing them a nice car, they could enable him a bit.

“tell me. how much money do you got there on the bag?” kihyun asks him once his fit of laughter dies down, quicker than changkyun’s. “i mean after me _and_ changkyun stole from you?”

“has it ever crossed your minds i let you steal from me all the time?” minhyuk fires back. he makes motion to sit properly, and gestures for them to get in the car. “also we should get going. they looked dumb but let’s not underestimate them and push our lucks.”

kihyun quickly gets in the car, eyeing the wig and masks like they personally offended him and it makes minhyuk wonder what really happened back there. he’s curious, but kihyun also taught him how to be patient. he knows he’ll come to him when it’s time so he tries not to think too much about it. changkyun on the other hand looks restless and eager to say something as he sits down on the passenger's seat. minhyuk turns the key in the ignition, closes the top of the car and hears changkyun complaining about how he wanted to feel the wind in his hair before he leaves the gas station without saying another word to them.

it’s weird this silence, especially after they were all joking around. silence it’s not something so foreign to them — minhyuk remembers a time where he was so silent around people he wondered if one day he would lose his ability to talk altogether. he remembers that kihyun too stopped sharing his thoughts a long time before he had met them, too afraid that someone would come and lock him up somewhere and he’d die without an ounce of creativity, too high on the meds the doctors would give him once he started getting restless and wanted to get out. changkyun used to lock himself in the bathroom of his job sometimes, too overwhelmed by having to maintain so many conversations in a day. but since they had been together, they had never shared a moment of silence quite this loud and minhyuk was lying if he said he wasn’t worried.

“we should go out.” comes changkyun’s voice like he has just read minhyuk’s thoughts. “crash some boring dude’s party, smoke a little something, get drunk. you know. celebrate.” he waves his hand in the air and tries to be nonchalant about it.

“celebrate what exactly?” kihyun asks him and there’s an edge to his voice. “that we didn’t get beaten up? that we had to listen to a bunch of homophobic bullshit and stay quiet?”

“kihyun. i thought you were over this.” changkyun sounds tired now. minhyuk wonders when they’re planning to fill him in on what’s happening. “we’re going to celebrate the fact that minhyuk stole this beautiful car and returned safely. that we found a bunch of money and are looking amazing because of you. it’s a pity if others don’t get to see your little extreme makeover project with the man.”

“i’m not going to be over it, changkyun.” kihyun’s rests his case there and doesn’t even spare changkyun a look.

“can you guys explain to me why are you fighting?” minhyuk starts to slow down the car looking for somewhere to park so he can actually focus on the conversation and not get them into an accident.

“keep driving, minhyuk.” kihyun says, looking at minhyuk like he personally offended him. it’s more an order than a request and minhyuk can feel the challenge spoken in between kihyun’s words.

minhyuk immediately swerves the car to the right and stops its movement abruptly, shaking both changkyun and kihyun from their seats and startling them.

“are you trying to get us killed?” comes changkyun’s complaint. “i hit my arm really hard.”

“good. start wearing a seatbelt. both of you.” minhyuk answers him. “i want to know what’s happening and one of you is going to tell me or we’re not leaving this middle of nowhere.”

“you sound like my mom.” changkyun says. minhyuk knows he’s not trying to tease him, just lighten up the mood, but it still makes minhyuk angry for some reason.

minhyuk turns to kihyun and notices the other has been staring at him. there’s anger in his eyes but his hands are shaking in a way minhyuk can tell this is not just a petty fight between the youngers. he wants to reach out and hold kihyun’s hands, ask him what’s wrong, but that’s not the way kihyun works — he’s gotta ask for help first to accept it.

so minhyuk waits. he counts the seconds in his head and refuses to break the eye contact with kihyun. he listens to changkyun get impatient and start drumming his fingers against the window, sighing heavily. he sees tears well on the brink of kihyun’s eyes and still remains stoic, no matter how much it breaks his heart to watch that. he knows changkyun is watching it too, because the drumming stops and changkyun shifts in his seat.

“kihyun.” changkyun calls, but kihyun remains looking at minhyuk. “baby?”

kihyun closes his eyes and the tears slowly roll down his cheeks. in the lighting of the passing cars it seems like he’s crying crystals and if the whole situation wasn’t so sad, minhyuk would’ve thought it oddly beautiful. kihyun tries to open his mouth once, twice, to talk, but the words don’t seem to come easily to him.

“i was afraid for the longest time of being alone.” kihyun starts once he finds a little courage in him and the other two remain silent — although they both want to assure kihyun he doesn’t have to say anything, that they were wrong in pushing him. “when i started… being me, people didn’t really like that. they used to tell me there was something wrong with me. that nothing i did was proper or that my parents must have thought of me as a burden.”

changkyun reaches out and holds one of kihyun’s hands, rubs his thumb gently over his fingers and squeezes his hand lightly. kihyun looks at him and gives him a nod. he breathes in deeply before continuing, looking at his hand and changkyun’s together.

“they did. they kicked me out when i was really young.” kihyun laughs in a way people do when they’re trying to act nonchalant about their pain. “i spent some time living with a friend until his parents too, kicked me out.” he looks up and stares at minhyuk. “that’s when i learned i should be afraid of being around people, not alone. so i shut myself off.”

“what did those people tell you, baby?” minhyuk reaches out, caresses the younger’s cheek and kihyun closes his eyes at the gesture. he rests his face against minhyuk’s palm and feels grounded, taken care of.

“i don’t want to talk about that. don’t want you both to hear that.” he says with his eyes closed and worry behind his voice.

“it’s ok. we don’t mind, sweetheart.” changkyun reassures him. “i’m sorry you had to go through that, though. i’ve already told you before, you’re a beautiful creative soul. it’s a shame people are dumbasses.”

kihyun laughs at that, it’s shy and small and endearing. changkyun wants to crawl on his lap and live there, tell him he doesn’t have to be alone anymore and that they love him until one of them falls asleep first. that his mind is amazing in all its quirkiness and that before him and minhyuk, changkyun never thought possible falling in love with someone else every day over and over again for the smallest of reasons — like how their eyes wrinkle when they smile, how their gummy shows. like how they sing really high on the shower, but are shy to sing in front of others when asked to. like how they are usually so demanding of themselves but are nothing but sweet to others.

“that changed when i met you, you know.” kihyun goes on after some time and changkyun is gladly pulled out from his reverie. “i was trying to disappear because i didn’t think i had a place in this world. i would never truly belong.”

“kihyun.” minhyuk starts but is quickly shut down by the other.

“no. no. let me say this.” minhyuk nods at him and kihyun goes on. “when you ran me over and i lived, i was miserable. and then you started to punch me because… yeah i would hit someone like me too if they threw themselves in front of my car, and i just had this urge to laugh. my first human touch in months had been a punch, what kind of fucked up situation was that, right?”

minhyuk scrunches his nose and kihyun knows he regrets it. knows that the apology is on the tip of his tongue even though kihyun never minded what he did that night. never thought he had something to forgive to begin with. “don’t. don’t give me your regret, there’s nothing to be regretful for. i needed that. it’s fucked up that i did? yes. but i needed that as much as i needed you and changkyun bandaging me up in the back of the car shortly after.”

“you were just unable to keep still.” minhyuk says and smiles. “you kept saying we should just leave you on the street and keep going. and then you proceeded to ask for some water, maybe a trip to the hospital and a lollipop shortly after. i wanted to laugh but i was trying to keep a serious face because i had this batshit boy in my car, you know?”

“i ramble when i’m nervous.” kihyun answers him. “i really wanted that lollipop, though, in retrospective.”

the three of them laugh and it feels like a huge weight has been lifted from minhyuk’s chest. “i bet you did.” is all he says, trying not to interrupt kihyun any longer.

“i was afraid, you know?” kihyun looks directly at changkyun. “especially of you. for you. you had the same look in your eyes that i did, but you were so beautiful i just couldn’t understand why. and you,” kihyun looks at minhyuk. “scared me because you touched me like you cared. you both did.”

“what do you mean?” changkyun asks him, and there’s something more behind his words than curiosity. “about my eyes.”

“you looked lost. sad.” kihyun tells him. “you looked like you wanted to be taken care of but  couldn’t bring yourself to ask for it.”

changkyun nods at that. “yeah. i guess i did.” but he goes quiet in a way that makes both kihyun and minhyuk look at each other, waiting. “good thing you were both there for me.” he says after he notices they were both silent suddenly.

“when i met you… i didn’t want to be alone anymore.” kihyun adds. “both of you.” he squeezes changkyun’s hand. “i’m sorry for earlier, again. you were right i shouldn’t have let it get to me.”

“it’s ok, baby. i get why you did. i’m sorry for not listening to you, too.” changkyun answers him.

they both turn to minhyuk and look at each other. they still haven’t explained what happened and although minhyuk is not pushing for it, they know he must feel left out.

“the guy who sold us the masks—” kihyun starts but is soon after interrupted by minhyuk.

“was an homophobic asshole to you and changkyun.” minhyuk finishes the sentence for him. “i figured when you started talking. we don’t have to talk about that anymore. i’m sorry i left you guys alone. i’m sorry you had to go through that. i’m… sorry.” minhyuk says and looks down, like he’s ashamed. like he’s blaming himself for something beyond his control.

“you gotta stop doing that.” changkyun says and grabs minhyuk by the cheeks with both hands, squishing them. “apologizing for shit you didn’t do. sometimes it’s really cute but right now it’s just annoying and unnecessary.”

“but—” minhyuk tries to say something but is quickly stopped by changkyun squeezing his cheeks harder, making him pout cutely, although angrily.

“no! hey, mister! the baby, and by baby we all know i mean me, is lecturing you, because you deserve it.” changkyun says, frowning.

“the baby is lecturing you, minhyuk. shame on you.” kihyun says laughing softly and shaking his head. “maybe you should teach him some manners later.”

as kihyun says it, changkyun whips his head in his direction with a question mark written all over his face. he looks lost, a perfect painting of innocence and outrage at the same time. he’s probably searching for the meaning behind kihyun’s words — if he was just fooling around to mess with minhyuk or if he was being serious about it.

“no. he’s right.” minhyuk says when changkyun gets too distracted by kihyun and releases his cheeks. “stop taunting him, yoo kihyun. and me, for that matter.”

“yeah. don’t discredit me when i’m trying to convey a message we’ve both talked about for for ages now.” changkyun says, but his voice sounds whiny and he’s pouting and kihyun finds it terribly hard to take him seriously. “minhyuk needs to know, don’t you think?”

“yes, baby.” kihyun caresses changkyun’s cheek before continuing. “you’re absolutely right. as always.” changkyun smiles at his words in a way kihyun wants to steal the stars right out of the sky and gift them to him just because.

“do you guys usually have secret conversations about me?” minhyuk meant for it to stay as a thought but his mouth was faster than his desire to keep it hidden. he turned in his seat, not wanting to hear an answer from the boys, and grabbed the wheel with his two hands. felt the way the leather gave in whenever he pressed on it harder. he closed his eyes and sighed hard before starting the engine and hearing it roar back to life.

“don’t you talk to changkyun about me too, minhyuk?” kihyun tries reasoning with him. “don’t we talk about changkyun and his nightmares when we think he’s fast asleep?” he puts a hand over minhyuk’s shoulder. “what’s so different about it when we do it?”

minhyuk realizes he hasn’t got a good enough excuse for acting like he did when kihyun is absolutely right. they also have their right to their privacy and secrets, even if they involve minhyuk himself, because he too has them.

“i’m sorry.” minhyuk says, letting go of the wheel.

“see. that’s a good reason to apologize.” kihyun points out. “and apology accepted by the way.”

minhyuk laughs, incredulous at the boy’s answer. “yeah, i get your point. now if you’ll excuse me i’d like to get the hell out of this middle of nowhere and find us a new place to stay.”

“can you open the top of the car now please? and can i choose the song?” changkyun asks before minhyuk gets the engine going.

“actually,” kihyun says shyly. “since we’re clearly not going out and no one is gonna appreciate you being dressed like that but me… i was kinda waiting for the right moment to use the gift you guys got me for my birthday and i’d really like to take your pictures first if you don’t mind? i guess?” he shrugs and looks out the window, trying to act nonchalant about it.

“it’s dark outside and we gave you an old camera. how you’re gonna do it?” changkyun wonders out loud.

“well, we have several flashlights in the trunk for some weird reason,” kihyun says, furrowing his eyebrows. “i could light them up in different points of the road, one of you could hold two up as well. maybe use the car lights? you guys would look like angels amongst darkness.” kihyun replies. “but, if we really have to we can get going.”

minhyuk kills the engine as soon as kihyun looks at him through the rear view mirror with his sad puppy eyes. he opens his door and sees changkyun doing the same to his. they both step out of the car and go get the flashlights before kihyun gets too nervous about the whole thing and gives up. he’s being postponing using that camera for so long they both had thought he had hated his gift.

when kihyun finally steps out of the car he takes a big breath before telling the boys where he wants the flashlights and where they should stand. he thinks about photographing them separately first and maybe together afterwards, trying to make the most out of it although it’s dark as fuck and there’s a good chance the pictures won’t come out like he wants them to.

“can i go first?” minhyuk requests and kihyun would be lying if he said he wasn’t surprised by it.

“yes, darling.” changkyun answers him although kihyun should be the one giving him positive feedback. “show us how it’s done.”

minhyuk is awkward at first. he just stands there looking directly at the camera, giving kihyun a creepy smile he can only imagine minhyuk thinks it’s charming. it’s kind of frustrating because minhyuk is hauntingly beautiful, but he doesn’t know how to use it in his favor in this kind of situation. kihyun also knows it’s partly his fault — he should be making his model comfortable.

“minhyuk, you look like you’re ready to murder us. you’re thinking way too much about it.” changkyun tells him when he notices kihyun frowning at the camera. “it’s just me and kihyun. no one else.” changkyun starts walking away as he says it, leaning into the passenger’s side and turning on the radio.

when kihyun starts taking pictures again, minhyuk changes. he puts his hand into his pockets, leans just so. there’s something about his eyes and the way they’re positively menacing now that makes kihyun wish he had better lightening just to capture it perfectly. he now and then dances to the music that’s playing and when he smiles it’s genuine, captivating, warm in a way only minhyuk is capable of. the clothes look so good on him and he actually plays around with the fact he’s wearing a cropped top. he pulls it up now and then, shows his stomach, and gets really shy right after it. kihyun finds himself laughing fondly at it.

“i’m done, i think. that was amazing, darling.” kihyun tells him as he lowers his camera and smiles.

“really?” minhyuk’s eyes shine as he questions him. “because i thought i was just being silly by the end of it.”

“you were being painfully you and that’s exactly what i wanted.” kihyun tells him. “you’re the most beautiful when you’re like that.”

minhyuk actually blushes at the praise and kihyun thinks the feeling of seeing it resembles christmas morning when you’re little and haven’t got a trouble in the world — except if santa claus liked the cookies and milk you left him.

“changkyun, it’s your turn.” minhyuk gestures for them to switch places and kihyun once again thinks he’s lost control over his own little photo shoot. “let’s see if you look as pretty as you do on camera too.”

changkyun strides over to where minhyuk was standing as minhyuk takes changkyun’s place beside kihyun. he positions himself and looks at kihyun expectantly as the other just stares at him.

“right. you’re distracting, sorry.” kihyun blurts out, making changkyun laugh. “just be you. as you told minhyuk, it’s just me and him. we’ve got you.”

changkyun nods. he takes minhyuk’s leather jacket off and drapes it over his shoulder, faces kihyun’s left while lifting his right foot a little from the ground, bending his knee as he does it, and looks at the camera. kihyun is mesmerized by it, he feels his hands shaking and he doesn’t know if his body is craving cigarettes or if changkyun just managed to make him nervous. he tries to snap a few pictures before he’s interrupted by him.

“sweetheart, i’m gonna look blurred in all of them if you keep shaking like that. i know i look good, but please, be professional.” changkyun is mocking him. he’s mocking him like the little shit he is and kihyun doesn’t mind him one bit.

he takes a good look at changkyun before continuing. the first thing he notices is his face, the way the bright red lipstick jumps out as soon as you look at him, the way his eyes pull kihyun in like magnets every time. the clothes look otherworldly on him, and kihyun is glad changkyun is his. glad he gets to appreciate him in all his moods and strange wisdom. changkyun lets him do as he pleases as he keeps quiet and relishes in the feeling of kihyun watching him while still posing, waiting.

“sweetheart. not to be that person but if you could speed things up a bit.” minhyuk whispers to him apologetically.

kihyun nods. “ok, baby. i’m gonna be really professional now as your highness commands.” changkyun laughs and kihyun takes the opportunity to snap the first picture he’s sure won’t look blurred. maybe it’ll turn out his favorite, he distantly thinks.

it’s easy photographing changkyun. it’s like he was born to be in front of a camera, he knows his angles and assets and how to use them. he knows exactly what kihyun wants before he even asks for it, showing his clothes and make up off just right. maybe in another life he would’ve made one hell of a good model, although he lacks a good 10cm on his height for it, but details, mere details.

“i’m done. thanks, baby.” kihyun tells changkyun. “you were amazing as well. thank you, really.”

“first, you don’t need to thank me. thank my mother and father for making me this hot.” changkyun starts. “secondly, can you take one of me and minhyuk together?”

“yeah. that was actually the plan.” kihyun answers changkyun and looks at minhyuk. “only if you’re comfortable with it, though.” he tells him.

“i’m basically a pro now, sweetheart. of course i’ll do it.” minhyuk says and walks towards changkyun.

minhyuk kisses changkyun’s cheek as he stands next to him and kihyun is quick enough to snap the moment, or he hopes he was — you never know with film. maybe minhyuk will come out with half of his face looking like a dementor sucking changkyun’s soul right out of his body.

“i only have like 3 shots left i think so,” kihyun gestures at them. “give me your best.”

the first picture kihyun snaps changkyun has his arm over minhyuk’s shoulder. he’s looking at minhyuk and you can see his big nose in all its glory. minhyuk is looking at the camera and he has one finger near his mouth, looking like he came out straight from a hallucination you wish it was real. the second one they’re kissing and kihyun gets really close to take it. he holds the camera with one hand and touches minhyuk’s cheek with the other, trying to be a part of it too, register their love. the last one changkyun and minhyuk are smiling. they both start moving their arms non stop thinking it’ll annoy kihyun, but kihyun knows their arms will just look like angel wings when the photos are developed.

“and we’re finished.” kihyun says and heads to the car. “we can go now too.”

“aren’t you forgetting something?” minhyuk asks him before he’s sitting on the backseat.

“no, i’m not.” kihyun grins. “i took your photos, my payment is you both gathering the flashlights and putting them back in the trunk.”

“and he has the guts to say _i’m_ spoiled.” changkyun turns to minhyuk and says it in a hush.

“what was that, baby?” kihyun yells from inside of the car.

“he just said we’re gonna do it as fast as we can so we can get out of here before someone finds us or something.” minhyuk answers for changkyun.

changkyun tells minhyuk to go on and start the car’s engine once again as he goes to gather the flashlights by himself. he loads them all in the trunk surprisingly fast and is shortly after claiming his seat right next to minhyuk. he presses the button that opens the car top and smiles.

“before changkyun gets carried away i wanna thank you guys again.” kihyun fidgets in his seat, he’s sounding small once more. “not just for the photos. for everything. for being there, for being the ones who ran me over and all that.”

“i’m glad we ran you over.” minhyuk says and instantly regrets it. “i never thought i’d say that to someone. that’s really fucked up.”

“he’s still glad, though. and i am too.” changkyun reaches for kihyun’s hand, once again having complete movement of his body due to not wearing a seatbelt, and squeezes it. “now, on a more important matter, you’re gonna hate my playlist.” he tells minhyuk and kihyun and lets go of kihyun’s hand. “and i’m gonna love every second of it.”

kihyun rolls his eyes at him, but he still looks too fond for changkyun to take his annoyance seriously. he’s smiling after all and he had just told him he’s glad he ran him over alongside minhyuk. minhyuk on the other hand snorts loudly and starts driving as soon as britney spears’ voice fills out the car speakers.

“i should have seen this coming when i decided to steal this car.” minhyuk says under his breath as changkyun screams the lyrics to britney’s “criminal”.

changkyun looks behind him, through the rear view mirror, and finds a mist of annoyance and love painting kihyun’s face as he puts his hands over his ears. kihyun thinks he’d rather listen to britney’s discography and sleep in cars forever before letting his two boys go.

maybe that’s what love is afterall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is my second baby. i'm not playing favorites, but he's sweet isn't he? last chapter coming sometime this week!


	3. changkyun.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> are moon flowers the ones which grow at night? and if so, is changkyun just like them?

between the masses of bodies grinding together they can barely make out changkyun safe for the aura the boy has around him. he thrives in situations like this like the little devil he is. kihyun would say he’s eros in a modern setting when he puts his mind to it. since he came in the door not one person was able to resist him just the way he had planned. changkyun loves the attention but what he loves more about it is telling people no after he gets their hopes up. bratty, bratty, all the way bratty. minhyuk is watching changkyun put on a show from afar, dancing between two girls like it’s the last opportunity he’ll have to do it. kihyun has made multiple comments about changkyun’s behavior but minhyuk as always is just intrigued by it. their boy is a wild little thing, fascinating to watch, if you asked him. he understands where kihyun is coming from, he feels the jealousy as well, but there’s something more underlying it. it’s changkyun’s way of telling them he’s desired but he only wishes to be desired by them. they’re the only ones that will always get the answer they want out of him.

changkyun feels light and sticky and hot. everything surrounding them it’s draped in red lighting and the bass fills his ears in a way he had missed. he’s aware there’s bodies grinding on his own and he can feel two pairs of eyes watching him, even from afar, even if his eyes aren’t exactly opened. it burns in the back of his skull, in the pit of his stomach. he’s being bad and the thrill of it makes a smile spread slowly on his lips. he tilts his head up to the ceiling and breathes deeply. he needs another drink, maybe even two.

kihyun watches the way changkyun is coming their way smiling. the way changkyun’s hands run through his hair, the way his eyes are almost closed and he turns his head to his sides now and then like he’s crossing a street, or looking for something, someone. kihyun thinks about burning those leather pants he’s wearing at the same time he wants to thank whatever designer had the brilliant idea of making leather pants in the first place. his shirt has way too many unbuttoned buttons — certainly more than when they had first arrived to whoever party this was. he looks like debauchery and kihyun wants to taste him, bite the apple even though he knows it’s poisoned.

“would you be a darling and get me another drink?” his voice is sweetly drenched in second intentions. minhyuk knows it, he knows it and still plays along with changkyun. likes to see how far he’s willing to push it before someone does something.

“don’t you think you had enough, _baby_?” kihyun answers before minhyuk can. 

“sure, baby. do you want anything else?” minhyuk says as soon as kihyun finishes his sentence. he smiles at changkyun and grabs a stray strand from his hair, pushes it back. there’s nothing but mischief behind his eyes.

“can i come with you?” comes changkyun’s reply. he sounds small, uncertain, but it’s all an act and they both know it.

“sure you can.” minhyuk intertwines their arms and walks slowly to where a bar was set up.

kihyun watches them go as the lights blink and they’re suddenly in slow motion. changkyun appears to be looking over his shoulder while photographs are being taken — he’s still for a moment and moving the next. he smiles in a way that can only be described as wicked. kihyun thinks the imagery of it will always be engraved in his mind now. maybe that’s what poets meant when they said they were being haunted by a devilish woman. maybe that’s the same kind of smile they said their most enjoyable nightmares were consisted of.

minhyuk feels changkyun laugh more than he hears it with the loud music and he just knows he’s riling kihyun up. if he could have heard he’s sure changkyun’s laugh would sound small and low like a little child behaving badly and eating their birthday cake frosting while everyone sings them happy birthday. he has been oddly quiet the past few days and minhyuk is glad his idea of getting him out of the house helped, but he’s still waiting for when changkyun’s gonna fall and they’re gonna have to catch him. he lets him have his moment for now though — he’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy watching kihyun get frustrated as well.

changkyun makes minhyuk drink too, although he knows minhyuk isn’t one to usually drink. asks him to take a drink for kihyun as well as he makes his way through the crowd once again, red cup in hand, without sparing a glance behind him. now and then people reach out to him, whisper in his ear what they’d like to do to him, this one particular girl going as far biting his ear before saying anything at all. changkyun sees her bottom lip bleed and thinks about the irony behind getting cut by a snake shaped earring. a song he’s way too familiar with starts playing and he knows kihyun was the one who asked the dj to play it. the ominous bass reverberates through the walls and changkyun feels it in his bones. it feels like something dangerous is taking over him as the music progresses and he sways to it all alone. the lyrics run through his mind and he can’t stop thinking about kihyun or minhyuk.

he gets lost in it, closes his eyes and keeps swaying along with the crowd, lets it take him as waves would. hands touch his waist from behind just as what seems like a distorted scream makes an appearance again on the beat. they’re familiar and accompanied by a pair of lips right where his neck meets shoulder. kihyun is holding him and dancing along with him, he’s sure of it. he wonders distantly where minhyuk is when he feels the weight of being watched drop in the pit of his stomach once again.

when changkyun finally looks at minhyuk, arms crossed leaning against the nearest wall, minhyuk can’t help but grin at him. he looks so far gone — his irises almost pitch black, sweat slowly rolling down his tanned skin, mouth slightly open like breathing is not coming as easily to him anymore. he can’t wait to wreck him. he thinks about making him beg this time, see just how far he’ll endure it, before he asks for what he wants in a way both him and kihyun are satisfied in hearing. he looks at kihyun too, the way his hand seem to be grabbing changkyun with a little more force than necessary, wrinkles forming on the silk shirt the younger one is wearing. he too, opens his eyes and stares at minhyuk, a silent request for permission and as minhyuk nods his head he starts sucking on changkyun’s skin, right behind his ear, changkyun’s head coming to rest on his shoulder shortly after it, mouth forming a little ‘‘o’’ shape. it’s obscene — some would even say filthy — and really pretty at the same time.

“want us to take you home, baby? or you still haven’t got you fill of stranger’s kindness?” kihyun whispers to him before diving back, biting changkyun’s shoulder in a way he’s sure it’s gonna mark the boy up. he kisses it, rolls his tongue gently over the bite indents and blows air on it once he retreats, feels the way changkyun shivers.

changkyun grinds harder on kihyun’s front just to hear the way his breathing gets unstable, a moan trying to fight its way out. “you can always have me here, in front of all these people. i bet they would thank you for it.”

“i don’t care for these people.” kihyun separates himself from the younger and changkyun feels the absence of his warmth immediately although he’s burning all over. “come find us whenever you feel like leaving.” he whispers and smiles in a way that makes a dark kind of chill settle deep down on changkyun’s bones.

kihyun knows he has to move fast. changkyun is a smart little thing and he wants him to think a bit before finding them. he gestures from afar to minhyuk and he gets on the move too. the beat has changed to something slow and sensual, the lights flick on the tempo, and he sees that as his cue to blend in unnoticed by changkyun. the kitchen is not too far away, the only room in which you can actually see the moon shining on through a big window over the stove. he knows minhyuk is following him, knows exactly where they’re going.

the lights start blinking once again and changkyun tries to follow kihyun’s moves but he’s gone, disappeared between bodies and darkness. changkyun feels like he imagined everything that just happened a second ago, like kihyun’s smoke and changkyun tried to grab him, only to end up with empty hands. he feels liquid, unstable. everything seems to move too fast and too slow at the same time. he looks to where minhyuk was standing, watching them, but he seems to be gone too. he closes his eyes, caresses the bite mark over his shoulder, feels the way the skin is hotter there, and inhales deeply. he thinks suddenly of looking out into the night, to the moon, when he was little and felt lost and he knows where to find them.

minhyuk thinks the moon looks big tonight — too big. he’s leaning against a fridge in a stranger’s home watching the way kihyun’s legs don’t touch the ground and it makes him look smaller than he really is as he sits atop the table. he moves them slowly looking at the window, takes a lollipop out of his back pocket and minhyuk feels the urge to laugh.

“what kind of game are you playing here, darling?” minhyuk asks and kihyun turns to look at him.

he looks haunting. his eyes are way too dark as he stares at minhyuk, head leaning a bit to the right. the lollipop has painted his lips red and it could look like blood if the shining from the moon hit his face just so. his skin looks like porcelain — minhyuk is sure he’s not human for a few seconds. as kihyun opens his mouth to answer him, uncertainty paints itself across his face and minhyuk remembers he’s human, too human even if such a thing exists.

“i don’t know.” kihyun sighs. “don’t you have this feeling sometimes that things are gonna go wrong? so strong it makes you dread the days passing by?”

“not like you do, but i know what you mean.” minhyuk knows where this is going now, but he still asks. still wants kihyun to say it. “why is that relevant now, darling?”

“changkyun is restless.” kihyun takes slow licks at his lollipop like he’s thinking how to organize his thoughts and put them into words. “i know you’ve felt it too, but there’s something more. it’s not because we’ve took too long to settle somewhere this time, i’m sure of it.”

“that’s why you wanna take him apart under the moonlight?” minhyuk blinks slowly and it’s like he can already see changkyun splayed under kihyun in their bedroom.

“i wanna give him something. everything. i don’t know, minhyuk.” kihyun runs his hands through his hair and sighs deeply. “if that’s what he wants, then yes.”

they’re interrupted by changkyun opening the kitchen door abruptly, almost stumbling through it, even though they all know he’s not even close to drunk. he smiles as he sees them both waiting for him there.

“the moon, huh?” he looks over kihyun’s shoulder, scoffs. “you sure like your simbolism, don’t you, sweetheart?”

he sounds so cocky, so defying. he’s mocking kihyun and minhyuk is sure kihyun would already have punched whoever it was if it wasn’t changkyun talking right now. he gets off of the table with a little jump and he looks so calm, minhyuk finds himself entranced by the whole scene. he approaches changkyun slowly until he’s backed against the door and can’t escape kihyun’s hands, his eyes that pierce through his soul.

“what are you acting so reckless for, baby?” kihyun caresses his cheek and changkyun’s eyes follow the movement his fingers make.

“you, better than anyone else, should know the beauty behind destruction.” changkyun answers and grins. “don’t you like art, darling?”

kihyun lowers his thumb until it touches changkyun’s bottom lip. he presses it down gently at first as the younger parts his lips slowly, too entranced by the sight of it to answer changkyun properly. kihyun feels changkyun’s tongue other than sees it move across the pad of his finger. it’s tentative, small, like a kitten would do. he watches as changkyun gets a little bolder, tries to suck his finger in, scrapes his teeth gently along it. his breathing is irregular and hot like he can’t help himself. he’s _so easy_ for kihyun. for minhyuk. he likes to pretend he’s in control but reality is he loves giving it up.

minhyuk approaches them slowly, changkyun too focused on kihyun’s finger to notice, kihyun too entranced by changkyun to feel him behind him at first. there’s a shift though, when he feels minhyuk, melting instantly on his arms as he holds him by the waist from behind. changkyun is left watching them as kihyun’s hands leave his body to intertwine themselves around minhyuk’s neck, fingers on his hair.

kihyun is a phenomenon in itself, changkyun thinks. he’s adaptable like a chameleon and every color he paints himself in is even more beautiful and intriguing than the last. it still blows changkyun’s mind until this day how kihyun is so quick to adjust to both he and minhyuk when they’re like this. he knows how to give both boys what they want and it’s like he craves both sides to feel complete. when he’s like this changkyun always notices how his eyes have a special glinter to them and he wonders if he looks the same when he’s under them. if they think he’s just as beautiful as he and minhyuk think kihyun is right now.

“changkyun.” minhyuk’s voice brings him out of his reverie. they’re both looking at him like they’re trying to solve a puzzle.

“yes?” changkyun doesn’t recognize his voice. hasn’t recognized himself for awhile now.

“can we take you home, baby?” kihyun asks him, and it’s gentle. the way the words are spoken is so soft it’s like he’s trying to mend whatever he thinks he broke, like changkyun wasn't the one misbehaving. maybe he says it like that because minhyuk is holding him and he’s nothing but soft like that.

“why are you talking to me like that?” changkyun tries to separate his body further from the older boy, glues his back to the door like it would open a portal of some kind and get him out of there.

“changkyun, if you want to stay, we can stay.” minhyuk lets go of kihyun and tries to get closer to changkyun. “it’s your choice, baby.”

minhyuk sees the moment that changkyun closes himself off again. he dreads it and starts to understand what kihyun was on about earlier. there’s something wrong and changkyun is trying to ask for help at the same time he’s fighting it for some reason.

“no. take me home,” changkyun licks his lips slowly and stares at minhyuk. “fuck me in our bedroom. i don’t want you to be gentle about it, but do as you want.”

neither minhyuk nor kihyun answer his request, they just distance themselves from changkyun and wait for him to open the door. once he does is like their little bubble was burst. the music is suddenly loud again, so loud they wouldn’t be able to listen to one another. there’s people still dancing but they don’t seem as interesting or alive as before in changkyun’s eyes. they just seem to be trying to forget. the lights aren’t able to hide the makeup running down their faces, the sweat marking their clothes. changkyun feels like an outsider watching an experience unfold right before his eyes, and he’s not sure he likes the conclusion he comes to. he was a part of that not too long ago, how had he looked then?

the ride home is silent. changkyun feels small and he guesses he deserves it — he did ask them to drop the gentle act. kihyun is sitting with his little feet on the front seat, he’s not wearing a seatbelt as always, and now and then tries to sneak a glance at him through the rearview mirror. changkyun pretends he doesn’t see it, doesn’t want to see it.

he stops looking at the front seats after some time, focuses his eyes on the moon. it’s oddly big tonight, so beautiful it’s like it’s demanding to be seen — changkyun would like to be seen as well.

“wait for us in the bedroom, please.” minhyuk asks him when they arrive home. he sounds distant and it shouldn’t hurt changkyun when he specifically asked for this, but it does.

“don’t take your clothes off, changkyun.” kihyun tells him, as he closes the door behind them and makes way for the kitchen.

changkyun walks slowly towards their bedroom. he doesn’t light up any more lights than are necessary for him to see where he’s going even though he knows the way by heart. little specks of dust dance around him and when the light catches them, they glow faintly around the room, looking a little like his own private constellation. the air tastes different, like red wine and letting go. the house has always had an old feeling to it for him, like it knows secrets and has seen things. like it exists suspended in time and has its own magic to it. maybe that’s why he was so drawn to it when they had first seen it — they too feel a little like magic to changkyun sometimes.

once he’s in their bedroom he paces around, tries to calm down his nerves before minhyuk and kihyun decide to join him. the big window over their bed is open, the sky is clear tonight and he thinks he could count the stars one by one if he wished to. the way the moon shines down on their bed sheet is beautiful, the crimson of it looking even more alive. he supposes kihyun had planned them coming back home to this the moment he had made their bed in the morning. changkyun always thought red suited him best too. he reaches out to touch it, the silk cool and soft under his hand, as he notices minhyuk entering their bedroom, kihyun not too far behind.

minhyuk sits on his chair, just by the side of the bed. he crosses his legs and stares at kihyun, gives him a silent nod to start whatever it is he’s about to do. changkyun is curious, he feels anxiety spark on the pit of his stomach and he can’t decide if it feels good or not.

“i want you to take your clothes off, baby.” kihyun says as he approaches him and gives his lips a peck.

“not baby.” changkyun protests. there’s something about the pet name that’s too endearing, too soft tonight. he feels like crying when he hears it because he doesn’t feel deserving of it.

“it’s cute that you try to fight it.” kihyun smiles at him like he’s really amused. “you’re not in the position to make demands, _baby_. do as you’re told.”

changkyun takes one long look at kihyun and debates with himself if he should obey his order or try to fight it a little at first. it’s always fun to see kihyun lose his resolve, but for some reason changkyun has lost all the fight he had in him at the start of the evening — he just wants to be good. so he does as he’s told. he unbuttons his shirt, what’s left of it to unbutton anyway, slowly, his eyes never leaving kihyun’s. he folds it and puts it carefully away, just as the older boy likes him to do. he unbuckles his belt and toes his shoes off. he’s not wearing socks, never been a fan of those for some reason — prefered to have his fingers froze off in winter than wearing them — and kihyun always thought it strange. as he finally reaches for his pants, kihyun moves from where he was standing watching him.

“stop, baby.” kihyun holds his hands. “lay down on the bed for me.”

changkyun doesn’t hesitate this time. he looks for minhyuk before laying down and the look on his face is one of pure boredom. changkyun wants his approval so bad he thinks he would do anything to please him. minhyuk is a little like that — he’s quiet, understanding, prefers to observe others first before doing anything — and something about it makes everyone want to draw his attention.

“look at him, changkyun.” _not baby, not darling_ _or sweetheart._ minhyuk knows that’s the way to get what they both want out of changkyun. you gotta break him a little at first.

as changkyun locks eyes with kihyun, the older boy starts to pull down his pants slowly. he raises his eyebrow at changkyun when he notices the boy isn’t wearing any underwear, but refrains himself from commenting on it. instead, when he opens his mouth, changkyun is surprised by his words.

“you look heavenly.” kihyun sounds in awe. “it’s like you’re splayed on top of a million rose petals and not even the moon could resist the urge to kiss you.”

kihyun doesn’t give changkyun time to answer him as he climbs on the bed and starts kissing on his thighs, going up, up, up, until he’s sitting on top of changkyun’s thighs, his lips touching changkyun’s and the younger feels breathless. the breeze from the window is softly caressing his body everywhere kihyun has kissed it, and he’s aware of that only because the coolness of it feels like a gentle mercy on his burning skin. kihyun has always kissed like he’s hungry, like he’s ready to devour changkyun right then and there and changkyun finds himself wanting more still.

their tongues tangle together and kihyun tastes like cherry and a hint of something dangerous laying underneath. kihyun stops their kissing abruptly as he feels changkyun trying to rut on his thigh and changkyun tries to chase him involuntarily. he knows kihyun is just as hard as he is, he had felt it, and still changkyun feels cold as kihyun leaves their bed. abandoned even.

kihyun goes to give minhyuk a kiss and changkyun has always loved watching them kiss — minhyuk knows how to contain kihyun’s hungriness and still feed off from it —, kihyun is always pliant, lets minhyuk set the pace, kiss him slowly, savour every bit of his submission. their kiss is cut short by minhyuk this time though, changkyun can feel kihyun’s frustration when minhyuk hands him something and gestures for him to get back on the bed. the anxious feeling deep down changkyun’s stomach gets stronger as kihyun approaches him and in turn minhyuk just stares deep into his eyes.

“what do you want baby?” kihyun asks as he climbs on the bed once again. “do you want me to fuck you? or do you want me to suck you off?”

“i want minhyuk to kiss me.” changkyun is caught by surprise by his own request. usually he would be dying to get kihyun’s mouth around his cock — the things kihyun could do with it — but not tonight. not right now.

“no, changkyun. you gotta be good for kihyun first.” minhyuk sounds so distant changkyun feels like crying. “you know the rules.”

and he does. he knows minhyuk will only get involved when changkyun’s too desperate for it, just as desperate as kihyun. when he can’t just watch anymore and he has to orchestrate them like a maestro would. changkyun always feels like little notes on a music sheet mixing with kihyun’s ones forming a beautiful song only the three of them can hear. he can wait for that moment, he can be good, so he nods at minhyuk before speaking to kihyun again.

“you can do what you want.” changkyun knows those words are dangerous, but he doesn’t care at this point. he just wants kihyun. minhyuk. both of them.

kihyun doesn’t answer him, at least not verbally. he kisses changkyun again, this time it’s slow, like he’s thinking his next move. he bites changkyun’s bottom lip in the middle of it, not hard enough for it to split open anywhere, but for a second changkyun wishes he would. his kisses wander once they stop to catch their breaths. he starts kissing down changkyun’s jaw, until he reaches his neck and bites him there. changkyun tips his chin up and moans low, encourages kihyun to keep going. his hands roam around changkyun’s body, touching lightly at his skin like he’s mapping changkyun out, connecting his moles and forming a small constellation.

kihyun’s thumb finds one of changkyun’s nipples and starts teasing it as he kisses changkyun again. changkyun’s body arches up from the bed beautifully against kihyun’s own and they both get lost on each other — drunk off of each other. changkyun starts his rutting against kihyun’s thigh once again and this time kihyun doesn’t stop him, this time kihyun’s grinds against him too and changkyun is glad for the friction. they stop kissing to favor staring at each other, and kihyun is so close to him, changkyun can feel the other’s breath on his mouth, now coming fast, clearly affected by _him_. the thought of it goes straight to his head and he finds himself calmer now, at peace even if it's just a little bit.

kihyun starts to slow down his movements, kisses changkyun gently and tenderly once more before speaking. “i want to fuck you, baby. but i want to hear you ask for it.”

changkyun’s thoughts are a mix of “yes”, “please” and “now” but he finds himself searching for minhyuk again, for his approval, his _praise_. he finally breaks eye contact with kihyun to look at minhyuk. “can kihyun fuck me?”

minhyuk raises an eyebrow at him, certainly not what he had expected to hear from changkyun, his beautiful, clever boy — always a box full of wonders and surprises. he can‘t fight the smile that stretches across his lips and he’s glad kihyun grabbed changkyun by the chin as soon as it appeared, demanding changkyun’s attention back, so changkyun doesn’t notice how pleased minhyuk really is with him.

“why are you asking him, baby?” kihyun sounds angry. “are you disrespecting my authority?”

“no.” minhyuk interrupts kihyun. “he knows who’s really in charge here. seems like you forgot it, though.”

changkyun watches fascinated as kihyun changes his whole posture after being chastised by minhyuk. he looks small, uncertain. he’s looking at minhyuk like he’s sorry and can’t find the words to tell him just how sorry he is and that he hadn’t meant it like that. changkyun reaches for kihyun’s thigh, rubs little soothing circles on it until kihyun looks at him. he smiles down at changkyun, thankful for the younger grounding him, and finally answers minhyuk.

“i’m sorry, darling. i haven’t forgotten.” he keeps it short, knows minhyuk appreciates the gesture behind it more than the words itself. something about not letting their egos get in the way of what they truly want or what the others need.

“good boy.” minhyuk smiles at him before changing his focus back to changkyun. “and to answer your question, changkyun, yes. he can fuck you.”

kihyun revels in the praise and changkyun feels a pang of jealousy deep down on his chest. he’s the one who asked minhyuk for permission and still it seems like minhyuk is completely ignoring his existence. he regrets asking him not to be gentle then, he could be hearing all kinds of praise if he hadn’t been so transgressive before. he curses himself for it mentally as kihyun reaches for the lube he had dropped on the bed earlier.

he coats his fingers in lube, rubs them a bit against each other to warm it up, while looking at changkyun. kihyun positions himself between changkyun’s thighs once he opens them, kisses his lips as a way of distracting him from what he’s about to do. he goes slow, circles his finger around changkyun’s entrance teasing him. presses the tip in just enough to give changkyun hope he’s gonna finally finger him, and retracts it soon after. he keeps teasing changkyun mercilessly while kissing down his neck, his nipples, making sure to alternate between them, full on enjoying the way changkyun moans for him. a litany of requests falling from his lips kihyun has no rush at all to fulfill.

he’s interrupted, though, after a while. “kihyun, don’t make me wait that long.” minhyuk tells him and he says it like changkyun is just something for their amusement. it should be degrading but for some reason changkyun likes it, feels familiar enough and he knows how to deal with it.

at minhyuk’s request kihyun’s finger finally presses inside of changkyun and changkyun’s moan resounds around their bedroom. kihyun smiles down at him, looking positively dangerous and delighted on top of him. he starts moving his finger around slowly, dragging it across changkyun’s walls like he’s searching for something. changkyun gets the urge to fuck himself down on kihyun’s finger and tries to move in a way kihyun won’t notice it. it’s not relief per se but it feels like something more than what he’s given at the moment.

“more,” he tries pleading, sounding breathless. “please.”

kihyun seems to ponder his request, his finger slipping from changkyun’s hole slowly, torturously so. changkyun feels a whine leave his lips as kihyun fully pulls his finger from his body. it hadn’t been enough to make him feel full, but he does feel empty now it’s gone.

“does he deserve another finger, darling?” this time kihyun doesn’t forget to ask minhyuk.

“yes.” minhyuk answers him. “but clothes off first, kihyun. i want to see you too.”

kihyun nods while looking at minhyuk and pulls his shirt over his head. he throws it somewhere on the floor — the action nothing like his usual ways — trying to never let minhyuk’s eyes wander away from his. he tries getting his pants and socks off without parting from changkyun but it proves to be impossible, so he kisses him before extracting himself from between changkyun’s thighs. the kiss tastes like a promise changkyun is ready to hold over kihyun. he watches him as he takes the rest of his clothes off, almost in a hurry, and looks at minhyuk staring at him.

“how do i look?” kihyun sounds shameless as he outright asks minhyuk for praise.

“angelic, sweetheart. beautiful like a renaissance painting.” minhyuk smiles and it’s gentle. there’s nothing but truth behind his words and he’s able to convey that just by speaking them.

the moon highlights the blush that’s painting itself across kihyun’s cheeks and the very tip of his ears. changkyun couldn’t agree more with minhyuk. kihyun’s always beautiful, but when he’s content there’s a different feel to it. makes him want to never stop praising kihyun, even for the most mundane things.

kihyun doesn’t waste any time after that. he positions himself between changkyun’s again, rubs more lube against his fingers. he stares at changkyun for what it feels like forever, and changkyun gets the urge to hide from him. it's like he _sees_ him and that’s so different from anyone else he has had on his bed before. minhyuk does that too every time they fuck and he never knows how to act — now it’s no exception.

he’s glad, though, because this time around kihyun doesn’t make him wait long, seeming satisfied with what he found in changkyun’s eyes. two fingers enter him, the stretch of it is as painful as it is pleasurable.

“thank you.” he manages to say as kihyun’s starts scissoring his fingers.

kihyun keeps his pace slow, now and then alternating between scissoring his fingers open and just fucking changkyun with them. he gets lost in the way changkyun reacts to him. he’s not necessarily loud, but he’s enthusiastic and he doesn’t hide, doesn’t pretend. kihyun appreciates that, likes to knows he’s doing a good job. he holds changkyun down by his hips when he starts moving around too much and he’s sure changkyun will have his fingers marked on his skin the next morning. kihyun wonders if he could mark his fingerprints on the boy’s soul like that too.

he adds a third finger after getting minhyuk’s silent approval. he lets go of changkyun’s hips and feels as the boy starts to fuck himself on his fingers. kihyun tries to sneak his hand between his legs to touch himself but hears minhyuk clicking his tongue as he moves it down. he decides to touch changkyun instead and as soon as he does it, a touch so light it’s barely there, changkyun moans his name loudly. he looks like he’s in a frenzy now, trying to rut his hips up kihyun’s hand and down kihyun’s fingers at the same time.

kihyun feels changkyun walls clenching around his fingers and he knows he has found changkyun’s prostate. the boy stops his movements all together, eyes open wide staring at kihyun like he’s in panic.

“i’m ready,” changkyun starts chanting. “i’m ready, i’m ready, i’m ready. please. kihyun. i don’t want to come like this.” his words are rushed, he barely gets them out properly as kihyun punctuates changkyun’s every word with a quicker thrust of his fingers.

kihyun’s fingers slip off changkyun’s hole as he finishes his sentence then, and he cleans them against the sheets — a gesture so odd for the older boy changkyun would have questioned him about it in any another occasion. it’s been one strange gesture after the other from him tonight and changkyun can’t quite fathom what’s going on.

“say it, baby.” kihyun stares at him. looks at minhyuk soon after. “tell him what you want.”

“minhyuk.” changkyun extends his hand, tries to plead with minhyuk with his eyes. “please.”

minhyuk finally gets up from his chair. he walks slowly towards them and his eyes never leave changkyun’s. as he sits down on the bed, so close to both of them, he caresses both of their cheeks.

“you two have been so good for me tonight.” he starts. “you don’t have any idea how good you two look when you’re together like that.”

changkyun rubs his cheek gently against minhyuk’s palm seeking its warmth even though he feels hot all over. he feels as if minhyuk touch is grounding him to this moment and suddenly he doesn’t feel so unstable, so liquid, just following what the situation asks of him. minhyuk and kihyun have control of him and he’s safe. he’s always safe with them.

“what do you want from us, baby?” kihyun words follow minhyuk’s soon after.

kihyun looks soft when he says although minhyuk knows he’s gone. his pupils are blown wide, eyes black looking like the devil himself ready to take what’s his by right, and yet, he’s nothing but gentle with changkyun. he’s rubbing slow circles on changkyun’s hip bone and minhyuk isn’t sure who’s he really trying to calm down.

“i want you to…” kihyun has never seen changkyun sound so unsure before, almost like he’s embarrassed of what he’s about to ask. “you can do whatever you want, i just want you to feel good.”

“this is about you, changkyun.” minhyuk caresses his cheek once again. “not what we want.”

“what you want is what i want, though.” changkyun starts and he sounds kind of afraid now, kihyun thinks. “i just want you to feel good and i’ll feel good too.”

“are you sure?” minhyuk asks him, feeling the fear behind changkyun’s words too.

“yes.” changkyun nods as best as he can in his position. “i just want to be good.”

“you’re already being good, changkyun.” minhyuk leans in close and gives changkyun’s lips a peck. sweet, gentle, barely there. “do you have any idea? of how beautiful you are? how all those people there wanted you? we’re so lucky we’re the ones taking you home.”

changkyun squirms underneath kihyun like he’s trying to get away from minhyuk’s words. like they hurt and fill him up in places changkyun would rather keep hidden forever. he’s trusting them, he’s vulnerable and he’s open and it’s clearly something he’s not used to being, not like this at least.

“they have no idea how you’re like when you’re like this. and they would kill for a chance.” dark possession fills kihyun’s lungs, overflows through his mouth along his words. “but you don’t want them. do you, baby?”

changkyun doesn’t speak. he closes his eyes and squirms harder. feels like waves are hitting his skin gently and with every word kihyun and minhyuk say to him the waves reach higher and higher. he knows he’ll be submerged soon enough and it’ll become easier on him. easier to admit he’s lost. admit he needs them and he’s not sure he actually deserves them. admit it hurts every time they touch him because he’s so used to being used that being loved burns, consumes, makes it harder and harder on him if he has to leave. and it leaves him reeling and afraid thinking of the end of it all.

“changkyun, open your eyes.” minhyuk grabs him by the chin. “let us see you.”

and changkyun does, reaches for minhyuk’s hand on his chin. “let me see you too, then. both of you. please.”

changkyun looks intently at minhyuk when he says it. minhyuk looks for any signs of distress behind changkyun’s eyes but what he finds instead is some kind of peace. it’s so easy to get lost in changkyun when he’s like this, so easy to give into what he wants he supposes he really does have some kind of soft spot for the boy. kihyun may be right about the whole “spoiling changkyun” thing.

“kihyun,” minhyuk starts. “give changkyun a show.”

kihyun promptly reaches for the lube and looks at the bottle before deciding to place it in changkyun’s right hand. changkyun’s look is one of utterly confusion. he looks at the lube, at kihyun and then at minhyuk who looks unfazed by it all surprisingly.

“kihyun?” changkyun asks as he keeps staring at minhyuk.

“you said you wanted me to feel good, right baby?” kihyun grins. “well, i can put on a show for you, but i want you to work for it.”

changkyun keeps looking at minhyuk like what kihyun is doing is wrong. like he’s gonna stop kihyun at any point now. instead minhyuk smiles looking at kihyun. “you smart little thing.”

“you never said how i should do it.” kihyun explains.

“i didn’t.” minhyuk nods. “you heard him changkyun.”

changkyun’s brain goes into autopilot then. he grabs the lube, opens it and spreads it on his hand. he slowly reaches out his left hand, his fingers first dragging up kihyun’s thigh, over his navel and down his other thigh. he feels the goosebumps spreading over kihyun’s skin and the way his thighs shake a bit trying not move when changkyun is so close to giving him what he wants.

“stop teasing, baby.” kihyun tries to sound stern but his pitch is a little high, a little desperate.

“is this an order?” changkyun asks. “it sounds more like begging.”

“you would know what begging sounds like, wouldn’t you?” kihyun counters and there’s bite to his words.

“yes.” changkyun grins at him. “i’ve heard you do it to minhyuk many times.”

“it’s because he deserves to hear me unhinged.” kihyun looks calm and satisfied, like the cat who got the cream. “do you, baby?”

changkyun doesn’t answer him at first. he remembers himself to be good, do what he’s told. _always please and leave_. except it was never like that with them. they were kind and they actually cared about him, it didn’t matter how bratty he would get, how spoiled. but the voice in his head kept nagging and nagging and now it was so loud he couldn’t hear anything else. _be good, please them. do as you’re told. they’re in it for the benefits, not you._

“i want to earn it.” changkyun answers him.

his right hand reaches for kihyun’s cock as he says it and as soon as his fingers wrap around the length of it kihyun releases a whiny breath. changkyun is always marveled at how sensitive kihyun is, how responsive he gets.

he goes slow at first, letting kihyun ride his high, fucking his fist. he too doesn’t seem in a rush although he had been desperate before. his sounds are kept low and constant with each movement his hips make and changkyun is mesmerized by the sight of it. he decides to tighten his fist just a bit more, move a little faster, breaking kihyun’s rhythm, just to see if the older boy will react differently. he’s testing waters although he knows exactly what kihyun likes.

kihyun falls forward then, one hand on each side of changkyun’s head. he moans so close to changkyun’s mouth, changkyun is twisted between muffling it with a kiss or just appreciating the sound of it. there’s so much beauty when kihyun lets go, he understands why minhyuk likes watching them as much as he does.

“baby, why did you stop?” kihyun sounds breathless, gone.

changkyun hadn’t even realized he had stopped moving his hand. “sorry. was lost looking at you.”

kihyun’s eartips turn red again and changkyun can’t help but smile at him. his precious little boy, so shameless in his pleasure and yet so shy in getting praise.

“pour some more lube, baby. let me make you feel good too.” kihyun asks him and kisses him right after. again, just like minhyuk, soft, tender, full of adoration.

in the positions they’re in changkyun thinks it’s gonna take some time before he actually finds the lube again and pours it on his hand. maybe he shouldn’t have quit gymnastics when he was younger, as it definitely would have helped him now as he tries to bend himself while not moving too much away from kihyun.

“i’ll do it.” minhyuk says.

kihyun promptly stands again, sitting down on changkyun’s thighs. he looks at minhyuk expectantly and minhyuk smiles at him. changkyun looks as best as he can to minhyuk on his position, and notices the lube has been sitting on his lap this whole time. he had been waiting for this.

“do you want me to touch you, darling?” minhyuk asks.

kihyun nods, bites his lips. he’s dripping on changkyun’s stomach and changkyun has the sudden urge to taste it, taste kihyun. his desire, his love, his fears and paranoia. his finger reaches for his stomach slowly and he feels the weight of minhyuk’s stare on him. he rubs his finger in the mess kihyun is making and offers it for minhyuk to taste first.

kihyun is watching their little exchange and it makes him feel so needy for some reason as minhyuk grabs changkyun’s wrist and just licks his finger. when his tongue reaches the tip of it he turns changkyun’s wrist making it easier for him to suck changkyun’s finger, making sure he got every last bit of kihyun’s taste.

“kihyun, your words.” minhyuk tells him, still holding changkyun’s wrist. “you know better.”

“yes. touch me.” kihyun feels his tongue tripping over the words, his throat closing down on the urge to say please. it’s no fun if he doesn’t push minhyuk’s buttons a bit.

minhyuk lets go of changkyun’s wrist then. grabs the lube and pours it over his right hand, a too generous amount of it, that drips in their silk sheets. changkyun can’t help to feel appalled minhyuk is ruining his favorite sheets but also think it’s really hot he doesn’t care.

he grabs kihyun’s cock but his touch is so light, barely there it makes kihyun move again, trying to find some friction. unlike changkyun, minhyuk isn’t giving him anything, no move, no pressure where he needs it most. he’s literally just touching kihyun, making sure to spread the lube but nothing else.

“please.” kihyun thinks he’s weak as he says it so soon. changkyun thinks he wants to be that unafraid to ask for what he wants the moment he wants it.

“please what, darling?” minhyuk grins, knows he’s got kihyun wrapped around his finger —more accurately in this case, his hand.

“please touch me,” kihyun whines as minhyuk tightens his fist just a bit. “like you mean it, minnie.”

“that’s my good boy.” minhyuk tells him.

he gives kihyun exactly what he asked for, no teasing. minhyuk is used by now by all kihyun’s tells. his body talks, drips, shakes and minhyuk has made a whole manual out of it. he knows when to stop and when to keep going. he knows when he has went too far and when kihyun can take more. kihyun trusts him always and when changkyun stops to think about it, minhyuk has done the exact same thing with him. minhyuk _knows_ him, _sees_ him. somebody who only wants to use him wouldn’t do that, would they?

“changkyun,” minhyuk calls him but changkyun seems to be lost in thought. “baby?”

changkyun stops staring at minhyuk’s hand moving and focus on him. “yes?”

“do you want me to touch you too?” minhyuk offers.

“yes.” changkyun nods. doesn’t say another word and waits to see what minhyuk will do about it.

minhyuk surprisingly lets it slide. he reaches for changkyun with his other hand, slowing down the rhythm he had established for kihyun. the other whines as he does it, feeling every bit of the loss of it. he starts touching changkyun and changkyun arches as minhyuk spreads changkyun’s precum over his length as to make his movements easier.

changkyun tries to keep as still as possible, quiet. he watches kihyun move, tremble, moan, with his eyes closed on top of him and he thinks that’s one of the most addictive things he has ever felt — the desire to watch kihyun fall apart and mend him together again and again.

kihyun opens his eyes like he heard changkyun think, like he knows it, and stares down at him. changkyun feels the moan crawling its way out of his mouth and he can’t do anything to keep it in. kihyun moans soon after he hears it, a smile painting his face in satisfaction.

minhyuk lets go of them both at the same time and brings his fingers for kihyun to lick them. he does it, one by one, moaning every time he gets a taste of changkyun on his tongue. minhyuk cleans his other hand in the sheets as kihyun is giving his pinky little kitten licks like he’s trying to make the most of it now that’s basically done.

minhyuk retreats his hand and kihyun looks a bit disappointed by it. changkyun can’t help but laugh a little at it — the way kihyun’s chin wrinkles endearingly and his eyebrows furrow at minhyuk.

“are you having fun, baby?” minhyuk asks him as he gets up and changkyun feels himself panic a little.

“please don’t leave.” he says it so fast he doesn’t even realize he’s speaking until his words hit his ears.

“i won’t. how do you want me?” minhyuk asks him, bending down to his level. “i told you before, this is for you.”

“just… stay close.” changkyun thinks that’s enough. he would like his hand held too but maybe it’s not the time for that.

“ok, baby.” minhyuk sits close to them on the bed again. “whatever you want.”

“i really want kihyun inside of me right now.” changkyun counters.

“then tell him that, baby.” minhyuk says, reaching out and taking changkyun’s hair that has glued to his forehead out of his eyes.

changkyun turns his attention to kihyun, who has moved and is positioning himself now. “can you get on with it, pretty please?” he asks, sounding defiant, mocking.

“it depends.” kihyun answers him, laughing. “do you think you earned it?”

kihyun lifts one of changkyun’s legs and puts it over his shoulder. he grabs his cock and starts rubbing just the tip of it up and down near changkyun’s entrance. changkyun tries to move his hips down even though he knows it won’t get him what he wants.

“do _you_ think i earned it, ki?” changkyun fires back when he recollects his thoughts.

“i do, baby. i do.” kihyun answers. he ponders if he should say what he’s thinking to changkyun. he wonders if it won’t make more damage than good but he supposes he should always be honest. they had promised each other that much.  “the problem here seems to be you, though, and what you think you deserve.”

“just do it, ki.” changkyun pretends he hadn’t heard him. “c’mon. i want it.”

“are you sure?” minhyuk asks before kihyun says anything else.

“yes. yes, yes, yes.” changkyun starts chanting and moving down like the baby he is. “c’mon, ki.”

kihyun looks at minhyuk for guidance. minhyuk just nods at him to give changkyun what he’s asking for. so kihyun does. he starts entering changkyun slow and progressively, checking now and then if the younger is fine, if he can take more. changkyun always feels so hot, so tight, it’s hard having self control and going slow when all he wants to is to bottom out and start moving already. but he does it nonetheless — changkyun is always the priority.

“more, ki. i can take it.” changkyun says between gritted teeth.

“stop being impatient.” kihyun answers him. “we have all the time in the world, don’t we baby?”

do they? changkyun wonders. this could be over in minutes. maybe tomorrow, the day after that. in a month or in a year. kihyun and minhyuk didn’t seem to think about that, but cold reality was always knocking at changkyun’s door. he’s easy to replace, and he can tell them this thing they have wouldn’t work without the three of them together but what if it wasn’t true? what if one day they realized and left? he tries to shake those thoughts off his head and enjoy the way kihyun feels inside of him — they have now, he should at least appreciate that much, shouldn’t he?

he searches for minhyuk’s hand and grabs it, needing to feel connected to them both. minhyuk squeezes it gently and looks at him with eyes so soft changkyun has to look away.

kihyun finally bottoms out with a moan resounding through their bedroom accompanied by changkyun’s own. he bends down slightly before he starts moving and stares at changkyun.

“you can’t come, baby.” he warns changkyun. “not until minhyuk says so. do you understand that?”

changkyun nods. _be good. obedient. do as you’re told._

“good.” kihyun grins. “‘m gonna start moving now. tell me if you need something.”

changkyun nods again and feels kihyun slipping from inside of him slowly. he moves forward and enters him a little bit faster now. changkyun tries moving his hips in the same rhythm kihyun is setting but the way he is holding his leg makes it difficult to.

minhyuk is still holding his hand through it and as kihyun starts moving fast after some time, his thrusts short and strong, the sound of skin hitting against skin fills their room. on a particular hard thrust changkyun arches against him and kihyun makes sure to hit that specific spot over and over again.

kihyun moans wantonly, and changkyun hears himself mimicking his sounds back. he wishes kihyun would touch him, but he’s not sure he would last long if he actually did that.

kihyun enjoys each and every reaction he’s able to coax out of changkyun. he thinks the younger hasn’t noticed he’s been moving his hips down in little circles although his position isn’t meant to allow him that much. also changkyun sounds like a piece written by bach himself and kihyun wishes he could keep hearing him like that forever. contain it in a little music box and see the ballerina dancing to the way he makes changkyun feel.

he feels the weight of his desire drop like a heavy weight on his stomach and he slows his movements down, wanting it to last. drag it out as long as he can but minhyuk seems to have other plans for him as he releases changkyun’s hand and lubes his finger up.

minhyuk gets up from the bed, kisses changkyun’s forehead, as a way to tranquilize him, and tastes the salt on his skin. changkyun reminds him of the feeling cold water had on his skin as he entered the ocean on the hottest day of the year when he was younger. changkyun is nostalgia of the best moments in life at its finest.

“just give in into it, darling.” minhyuk says, standing on his knees on the bed behind kihyun. “give him your best, but don’t hold back from how good he makes you feel.”

minhyuk teases his finger around kihyun’s hole and changkyun feels the way it affects kihyun. he reaches out for kihyun’s nipples, starts teasing them as minhyuk is slowly fingering him.

“give into us, ki.” changkyun tells him. “give into me.”

that seems to be enough to kihyun. he feels himself giving into what his body wants, moving faster and faster inside of changkyun and at the same time down on minhyuk’s finger. he drops changkyun’s leg down on the mattress, bending down and caging changkyun once again. changkyun accommodates to their new position, still pinching kihyun’s nipples now and then.

minhyuk can feel kihyun is closer now. he’s clenching down on his finger, his moves erratic. he’s surprisingly quiet, concentrating on the feeling of it all probably. he knows he has found his prostate the moment kihyun freezes completely, a cry almost falling from lips.

changkyun kisses kihyun and feels the moment he slips from inside of him, touching himself to his climax while minhyuk gets another finger inside of him. changkyun swallows all of his moans proudly knowing he made him feel that good. he feels more than he sees at first the mess kihyun is making all over his belly.

“that’s it, darling.” minhyuk’s voice guides kihyun through his high. the way changkyun kisses him calming him down and at the same time it prolongs the feeling. “ride it out. you look so beautiful.”

changkyun stops kissing him and grabs his cheeks, makes kihyun look at him although his eyes look glassy. “you made me feel so, so good. thank you.”

kihyun moans weakly and tries to get away from minhyuk’s fingers. oversensitivity getting fast to him as always. minhyuk is quick to retrieve his fingers and kiss between kihyun’s shoulder blades as he stands over changkyun again, getting on minhyuk’s level.

“oh god.” kihyun says, getting off changkyun and dropping beside him on the bed. “that was…”

changkyun is waiting for the praise anxiously. he needs it. needs to be certain he was good. that maybe that will guarantee kihyun is going to stay just a little bit longer with him.

“i have no words.” he laughs, breathless. “i’m pretty certain changkyun’s ass should be qualified as the eighth wonder of the world, what the fuck.”

minhyuk and changkyun laugh together at kihyun’s words. suddenly the mood between them is so light the voices quiet down on changkyun’s mind. the waves he felt before are submerging him and he lets them. basks in the feeling of not feeling anything but every place on his body that’s throbbing with the need of release.

“minhyuk don’t make him wait too long.” kihyun tells him. “don’t be mean now.”

“i won’t.” minhyuk says as he gets up from the bed as to take his clothes off.

he does it fast and without a care for them. throws them on the floor like he’s getting impatient and kihyun thinks that’s such a rare sight to see — minhyuk letting his desire get the best of his self control.

minhyuk climbs on the bed and kisses up changkyun’s thigh. he does it methodically, memorizing every place on changkyun’s skin, saving it for later — a replay so vivid in his mind he wishes he would always be able to watch it when he wanted to. he’s distantly thinking about where he left the lube before, but apparently changkyun had beaten him to it because as he takes the same position kihyun had before, changkyun reaches for his cock, spreading lube all over the length.

changkyun feels everything like an outer body experience by now. he’s gone into auto pilot and he knows he just needs minhyuk inside of him, and he needs it fast. needs to make the other come and finally get what he earned. he can wait, he can do it, he tells himself. he focuses on the way minhyuk moans his name, the way kihyun is kissing down his neck and he’s letting him, giving him more room to work hickeys over his skin.

minhyuk grabs changkyun’s hand gently and pushes it away, although his body begs him not to. going all that time without being touched always messes him up, but he learned how to reel himself in. there’s something rewarding in the way changkyun appreciates his patience and lets him do whatever he wants. even begs him for it when he’s really desperate.

“baby, look at me.” minhyuk coos at changkyun. changkyun immediately turns his attention to him. his eyes look a little unfocused and minhyuk knows he would anything right now. “you’re so beautiful.”

changkyun tries to say no, move his head. but he can’t bring himself to. he just lets minhyuk say whatever he wants. thinks that maybe this time the praise will stick to his brain.

“you’re so good. so smart.” minhyuk continues, aligning himself with changkyun’s entrance. “you sound divine, there’s really no other person out there for me and kihyun.”

minhyuk enters changkyun and changkyun whines, tries to hold onto minhyuk’s arms. he moves fast right out of the bat, taking advantage of the fact that kihyun has already stretched changkyun out. he’s feeling so much at once — emotionally and physically — that it seems like his chest is being split open in half, all his secrets pouring out in front of the two of them for them to prod and see. it doesn’t feel as bad as changkyun thought it would and he starts speaking although he knows that maybe he shouldn’t.

“how can you be so certain?” he starts and minhyuk slows down his movements as if on cue. “yeah, i’m fun now. useful. but you’ll get tired. i’m an only trick toy, and you guys are so much more.”

kihyun stops kissing down his neck in favor of drying changkyun’s tears that roll down his cheeks looking like diamonds under the moonlight. he kisses them away trying to convey just how much he loves and cherishes the boy. he feels his heart clenching down and he thinks about asking minhyuk to stop, the whole thing to stop so they can talk.

he doesn’t. changkyun wanted it this way. so he waits, and listens. even though it breaks him, even though his first instinct is to stop changkyun right then and there and comfort him.

“you both are everything.” changkyun hiccups and minhyuk starts touching him gently as he still keeps his movements light and slow. “and i’m… just the comic relief.”

there’s tears down his cheeks, hickeys blooming all over his neck. he’s moving down on minhyuk’s cock like he’s torn between chasing his release and waiting for minhyuk to let him actively do it. he probably would look like a mess to anyone else, but he looks just as beautiful as he had when the night started for the other two, if not more.

“changkyun.” minhyuk says and moved a little faster, tightens his fist a bit more. “baby. you’re everything. you’ve always been everything.”

kihyun grabs changkyun’s hand, kisses another tear that falls down changkyun’s cheek as he does it. “we’d go through hell and back for you. you deserve everything you want and i’d rather have nothing if i couldn’t have you and minnie.”

changkyun feels their words wash over his skin over and over again. the waves make a distant sound on his head now and it feels peaceful, whole. he wants to let go so bad but minhyuk has to let him. he needs minhyuk to let him.

“baby, let go.” minhyuk tells him, feeling himself get close too with the way changkyun is clenching around him. “let go for us, we got you. we’ll always do.”

and changkyun does, beautifully so. it hits minhyuk at the same time and he thinks he sees flowers blooming all around them one after the other like spring has come and they don’t have to hide anymore, don’t have to fear anymore. it all goes kind of blank after it and the only thing keeping him anchored to earth is the way changkyun moans his name and kihyun’s right after, the way kihyun is holding them both by their hands somehow.

minhyuk feels a single tear roll down his cheek. he’s quick to slip off of changkyun, taking advantage of the fact that he’s still distracted, still coming down from it all. he lays down and holds changkyun as close to his chest as he can, kihyun holding the younger from behind.

changkyun shakes between his two lovers and he feels the fear and dread he had felt earlier slip away. he feels so safe in this moment and he wishes he could them that, but all he manages is a low, broken “i love you”.

they stay like that for a while, until changkyun stops sobbing and hiccuping between them. it’s silent until the younger starts laughing and laughing and it’s so contagious the other two can’t help but laugh along with him.

“thank you.” changkyun says between laughs. “thank you for finding me and giving me a home.”

“thank you for finding a home in us and in the process giving us one too.” minhyuk tells him, caressing his hair.

“thank you for giving us love, baby, and meaning every second of it.” kihyun says.

changkyun hums. he feels a lot like himself suddenly. more than he has felt in days. “i needed that.”

“we know.” kihyun kisses his neck from behind. “and we’ll always be here to give it to you when you need it, changkyun.”

changkyun yawns suddenly and minhyuk laughs. ”looks like we tired you out, huh? for the youngest you sure have the lowest stamina.”

“i thought we were being soft here.” changkyun counters.

“well, we are. that’s why i’m going to run you a bath before you sleep covered in semen.” minhyuk answers him.

“ _semen._ ” changkyun repeats. “you’re such a nerd. no one would believe it you were on full daddy mode 10 minutes ago.”

kihyun is laughing in his silent-only-moving-his-body way. changkyun feels giddy for some reason that he made him laugh like that.

“i told you not to call me that a hundred times already, changkyun.” minhyuk tries to scold him but there is no bite to his words, only fondness. “i’m gonna get up now, ok?”

“no!” changkyun wraps himself around minhyuk like a python would. “let’s sleep like this, you can run that bath in the morning.”

kihyun sighs. “you’re gross. you’re gonna wake up complaining that you’re feeling gross and that we shouldn’t have listened to you.”

“no, i won’t.” changkyun counters.

“yes, you will.” kihyun says. “you’re gonna complain and ask me to cook something for you as you take a bath and i won’t do it.”

“yes, you will.” changkyun sounds just like the little shit kihyun and minhyuk have grown to love.

“i won’t run you a bath either.” minhyuk warns, siding with kihyun.

“yes, you will.” changkyun repeats. “i don’t know why you keep lying to yourselves every time.”

they both sigh. they know changkyun is right and there’s no arguing with that. they’ve spoiled him rotten and truth be told — they would do it all over again.

“let me at least get a wet towel.” minhyuk tries bargaining. “i feel gross and i bet kihyun does too.”

changkyun feels kihyun nodding where he’s resting his chin over his shoulder. “ok. but don’t take too long. i’ll miss you.”

“i bet you will.” minhyuk laughs as he gets up and moves towards the bathroom in their suite.

changkyun thinks as he watches minhyuk’s form under the moonlight walk, and feels kihyun warmth seep into him, that he has figured out why love burns.

it burns because it leaves a mark on you. every little thing the other person — in his case “persons” — loves and hates, cherises. their little habits, the way they wake up in the morning or like their coffee. it all gets marked on you. it creates associations that will remain for a long time or maybe even forever. having that happen to a being that is so inherently selfish is obviously going to hurt. you’ve got to create space within yourself for somebody else and learn how to compromise, but it hurts in such a good way changkyun thinks he’d rather feel the pain and learn where to find the pleasure in it than to give up the feeling entirely.

he knows they’re worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof, this has been a long ride for me. it's not perfect but boy did i have fun. i have to thank so many people i don't even know where to start actually.  
> this is a gift for talia. my precious little baby. if it wasn't for her this baby wouldn't even have been born in the first place. to think it started out as a joke and then. well 27k?ish words later here we are. thank you for always sticking by my side and being patient with me. i love you dearly. hope you liked this as much as i liked writing it.  
> lolla, mari, fernanda, thay, thank you for reading it ahead and giving me your thoughts, i appreciated every moment of it. you girls are the best, honestly.  
> to anyone who has taken some time of their day to read this thank you. to the people who left comments, kudos.. thank you. it meant the world.  
> i'll miss my three babies :(  
> oh some of the songs mentioned on this chapter!  
> tear you apart - she wants revenge  
> ghost - the acid  
> also worship - years and years HELPED ME SO MUCH.  
> for the others it consists of lana del rey, criminal by britney, sweet by cigarettes after sex and the internet's songs as a whole.

**Author's Note:**

> yEEhaw. hello. this is beta'd by me every error here is my mistake only. i've been writing this for so long can't believe it's finally seeing the light of day.  
> it's finished already and i'll post the other two in a span of a week! thanks for reading, i hope you liked <3  
> special thanks for all my babes that read it before and supported me, i love you <3  
> (the fic will deserve its explicit rating on the end!)  
> also my twitter is @hyunghyuns <3 feel free to come by


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